Day 19: No Regrets

Live life with no regrets. That’s a life motto I took up the day my dad died.

He had lived a full life when died almost two years ago. He died quietly at home, in his bedroom, my mom holding his hand in the cool of the morning as the sun streamed gently from the east over the Pacific Ocean.

He went so quietly that my mother didn’t notice. He had been failing the two days prior. My sister, a physician like him, was home from San Francisco at the time. She called me around 9 am that morning and said that his pulse was weak and that his time was imminent, we should come over soon. She called back within 20 minutes to say, “Dad’s gone.” It was as if he slipped out the door.

That day, I knew that life needed to be approached with a no-regrets attitude.

• When I have the power or even tiniest ability to forgive, do it—and do it again.
• When I have the smallest urge to make a conciliatory gesture, do it.
• When I have made a mistake that hurts others, own up to it.
• When there is a misunderstanding because I have not communicated clearly, clarify.
• When I have the opportunity to do something that I will later regret if I don’t, grab it.
• When I see I can make a difference in someone else’s life with even a smile or thank you, express it.
• When I appreciate someone’s work or effort, tell them.
• When I understand that this prickly irritability really has to do with hormones, explain it.
• When time spent doing insignificant things with someone I care about looks trivial, waste it.
• When the small things in life suddenly look beautiful, admire them.
• When I’ll never pass that way again, pass slowly.
• When humility on my part can solve a problem, lay my body down.
• When my weaknesses can accomplish more than my strengths, surrender.
• If I can look back on my life and see a road that has led me to become a better person, thank God for it.
• If I can learn from others, especially my children, be teachable.
• If new perspectives change a situation from hopeless to hopeful, turn with them.
• If old habits have outgrown their usefulness, retrofit them or discard them altogether.
• If I don’t need something, don’t take it.
• If I see the bright side of things, shine a light on them for others.
• If I can extend grace to people who would benefit by a little slack, be generous with it.
• If patience will make me a better person, practice it just a little longer than I think I can.
• Whenever I can, tell those I care about that I love them.
• When it’s hard to say I love you with words, show it without words.
• When I think I hear God’s voice, listen.
• When I know I hear God’s voice, follow.
• When people pass out of my life, let them go gently.
• When crying is necessary, don’t hold back.
• Remember to say hello and goodbye, thank you and I appreciate you.
  

Live with no regrets.

Posted by email from 40 Day Fast (posterous)