Friday, September 22, 2006

Home Alone

In the classic 1990s holiday comedy film, “Home Alone,” the family inadvertently departs on Christmas vacation without 8-year old Kevin. Home alone, Kevin has the run of the house, the time of his life and ends up the hero when he foils two burglars who have their eyes on the family home. Not so for me. In my recent personal Home Alone experience, I did not have the time of my life and did not end up a hero. I did have the run of the house, and that was the problem.

Everyone but 11-year old son Quinn had flown the coop. Older son Dylan had sayonara-ed west for school in Japan, daughter Noelle had flown east to study in London, and husband Dan had bid adieu for California. After the clatter and clutter of a revolving-door summer, of kids coming and going, and never knowing exactly who was home at any given moment, the house stood still. I stared into my first night of massive quiet in months.

I had been looking forward to this.
I could restore law and order, clean up, clear out. Mine, all mine! I could have it My Way. Queen me. I had the crown, scepter, title, power, full reign. Yes!

But there was a problem: I was Home Alone (except for Quinn who was dead asleep, smart kid). That meant everything I wanted—pick up that sock, throw out those newspapers, run the laundry, answer the phone, turn off the light, straighten, sort, save, shut, shimmy—had to be done by me.

Bummers
No one to order around. No one coming back later. No one to delegate to with a strategically-placed note. If anything had to be done, I had to do it. My wish was my command. Was that good news?

With my all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful presence constantly looking over my shoulder, breathing down my neck, holding my feet to the fire …I found myself getting pickier and pickier, more demanding, less merciful. The Queen in me left no stone unturned. The Slave in me shuddered at my every glance.

“A receipt. It needs to be put away. I can decide where to put it later. Yes, but it will stay there until you do. Not going anywhere until you do. Will be there every time you look until you do. Do it now, now, now….”

But it wasn’t just one receipt. I noticed everything. In the middle of one task, I’d order Me to do another. Trying to keep up by multi-tasking only tore me in multiple directions. Couldn’t stop to write a list: my orders to Me were coming too fast. By the end of the evening, I was exhausted, frustrated, mad at myself. I put Slave and Queen to bed, and next morning fled for another kingdom.

What I Learned
1. A Math Lesson
Alone = 1.
Count it. Go figure.
No matter how powerful I feel, One raised to the umpteenth power (1n) still equals One.


2. A Management Lesson
Queen for a Day morphs quickly into Slave for the Night— a promotion and demotion all in one. Better to step down quickly before one or both of me gets killed.

3. A Music Lesson
Three Dog Night was right. One is the loneliest number. [Lyrics for "One” sung by Three Dog Night]

Bottom line
Doing the Home Alone thing and trying to run your life will ruin your life. We just don’t know how to manage ourselves. The Queen in Me can’t cut it, and the King in you will be a killjoy. We all need help, direction, guidance, perspective. Moreover, we need to be willing to accept help, take direction, receive guidance, change our perspective.

My recent Home Alone episode was a miserable failure; but I learned something. I am never alone, will never be long left to my own devices because I have invited Jesus Christ to be a part of my life, into my heart, into my home. He saves me every time from my good intentions gone bad, and my bad ones that were never going to be good.

One of my husband Dan’s mentors, Dr. Robert Munger, wrote a college talk, later published as a booklet called “My Heart, Christ’s Home.” He describes what happens when we choose to give up The Kingdom of Me and ask Jesus Christ to live with us.

If you have not invited Jesus into your home, your heart, please consider it. He’s saved me from myself, is showing me how to manage and not mangle my most important and treasured relationships, given me security, joy, peace, adventure. He has given me and all who welcome him a home in this life and one in Eternity.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to take out the trash.

READ "MY HEART, CHRIST'S HOME"
Buy "MY HEART, CHRIST'S HOME"