Pam's Thots

Lentil Soup

2011-08-03T22:57:00.001-10:00

Lentil Soup

1 tsp minced garlic
1 onion, chopped fine
1 large carrot, chopped fine
2 stalks celery, chopped fine
2 Tbsp butter or olive oil
2 cups dry lentils, rinsed and picked through
1 heaping tsp sea salt
1 heaping tsp of cumin
1 14-oz can chopped tomatoes (optional)
2 quarts chicken stock, vegetable stock, or water

¼ cup or to taste of white wine or dry vermouth) optional

In a large stock pot, sauté the garlic, onion, carrots and celery in butter/oil until translucent. Stir in the lentils, onions, salt, and cumin to the lentils. Add optional tomatoes and stock and bring to a boil. Turn down heat to simmer, add optional wine, and let cook for another 40 min. The soup will naturally thicken. Salt and pepper to taste.

The lentils may be blended after the soup is done if you prefer a smooth soup. Half a cup of chopped spinach or Swiss chard may be added fifteen minutes before the lentils are done.

Tiny Thots: Pride is an action, humilty a result. | 07.13.11

2011-07-13T13:25:00.001-10:00

Pride references my ability, humility acknowledges God's.

Tiny Thots: If I should write a book, remind me to not make it a "How To" but a "How I" | 07.11.11

2011-07-11T17:48:00.003-10:00

Tiny Thots: If I should write a book, remind me to not make it a "How To" but a "How I" | 07.11.11

2011-07-11T17:48:00.001-10:00

Creamed Corn

2011-07-05T09:49:00.001-10:00

The richest creamed corn you'll ever have, but oh so good! Courtesy of my fab cooking friend Barb.

In a large pot, combine then simmer for 5 minutes:
2 20-oz packages frozen corn niblets
1-1/2 pints half & half cream
6 Tablespoons sugar
1 tsp salt
Pinch of pepper
1/4 t MSG (optional)

Mix together then add to corn:
2 Tbsp butter, melted
2 heaping Tbsp flour

Sprinkle with:
Parmesan cheese

Put into an oven-proof casserole. Cover and back at 350° for 30 minutes. To brown, remove cover for last 10 minutes. Alternatively, simmer on stove until thickened, stirring occasionally.

Lebanese Vegetable Soup

2011-06-25T16:55:00.001-10:00

My sister and her son in Palo Alto recently introduced me to a delicious and hearty Lebanese Vegetable Soup that she picked up from the deli at her local Whole Foods Market. I scoured the internet and happily found several recipes online, including one from the famed Sunday’s at Moosewood Restaurant cookbook. Below is my rendition, gobbled down by my husband, much to my surprise. Serve this to your vegetarian friends, as chickpeas are great for protein! If cooking's not your thing, check out your local Whole Foods Market, which may or may not have it on its hot foods line. Mine didn't. But that just meant I got to learn how to cook a new soup!

2 tablespoons olive oil
1 large onion, chopped (about 2 cups)
3 medium carrots, chopped (2 1/2 cups)
1-2 stalks celery, chopped (1-1/2 cups)
I bay leaf
3-4 twigs fresh thyme
1 teaspoon ground coriander seeds
2-4 garlic cloves, minced
1 1/2 - 2 cups sweet potatoes cut in 1/2" cubes
Sea salt to taste
Pepper to taste
1 qt vegetable stock
1 28-oz can Italian plum tomatoes (pomodori pelati), broken up with fingers and hard core removed
10 artichoke hearts cut into eighths (2 cans ), liquid drained and saved
2 cups canned or cooked chickpeas (garbanzo beans), drained

Optional seasonings
Dash of Maggi seasoning
1-2 tsp of sugar
Shot or two of white wine

Heat olive oil in a large stock pot. Add onions, carrots and celery and sauté only onions are translucent (7-10 minutes). Add coriander, bay leaf and thyme; stir to coat vegetables. Add sweet potato, tomatoes and their liquid, and drained liquid from the artichoke hearts. Season with 2 ample pinches of sea salt and pepper to taste. Bring soup to a boil, cover, reduce heat and simmer 10 minutes, or until sweet potatoes are tender. Add chickpeas and vegetable stock, and bring to a new simmer. Add artichoke pieces, and simmer for 3 minutes so the flavors can meld. Before serving, adjust with additional salt and pepper and optional seasonings (above). Also remove bay leaf and thyme twigs.

*If you prefer a thick soup, after sweet potatoes are tender, remove bay and thyme, then blend with an immersion stick blender; then proceed with recipe.

Café Beaujolais Cherry Clafouti

2011-06-25T15:17:00.001-10:00

Thank you, Margaret S. Fox!

After going on and on in an earlier post about clafoutis and Café Beaujolais, where I had my first love at first bite, here at last is the Café Beaujolais recipe for clafouti, excerpted from founder/chef Margaret S. Fox’s cookbook Morning Food. It requires little skill, mostly fresh fruit and a little patience while you wait to sink your teeth into it. I made a clafouti this morning using fresh raspberries, and oh my!

Clafoutis are traditional French desserts. My version has been adapted from a recipe published by Gaston LeNotre, then famous French patissier. Although they are especially good with cherries, they can be prepared with various kinds of fruit, including an assortment of leftovers, if that is whay you happen to have: apples, strawberries, pears, whatever. Anything but bananas or canned fruit cocktail, please. Canned fruit cocktail clafouti would set Franco-American relations back forty years.

1 egg
6 Tbsp white sugar
3 Tbsp white flour
6 Tbsp heavy whipping cream
1-1/3 cups pitted cherries
3 Tbsp melted butter (warn, not hot)

Preheat the oven to 400°.
In a bowl, beat the egg and sugar with a whisk until the mixture whitens. Stir in the flour and cream. Beat until completely smooth. Pour half of the batter over the cherries in a medium-sized bowl and fold together gently.

Spread the cherry mixture evenly over the bottom of a buttered 8-inch pie pan. Bake for 15 minutes. Meanwhile, beat the butter into the remaining batter, then pour this over the half-baked cherry batter. Replace in oven and bake for another 15 minutes, or unitl golden brown. Remove from the oven and let cool for 10 minutes. Sprinkle with powdered sugar and serve.

*Note: I’ve used a stick blender with a whisk attachment. The blender’s accompanying marked cup makes it easy to divide and pour the batter.

Apple Clafoutis

Daniel Fast Pick-Me-Up

2011-04-07T17:10:00.001-10:00

Apple banana slices over fresh ground organic almond butter spread on whole grain crackers. I seriously think it takes longer to [munch-munch] eat these then make 'em. Pretty satisfying.

Untitled

2011-03-16T22:00:00.001-10:00

Leeks, potatoes…that’s about it.

Shopping at my local farmer’s market the other day, I happ’d upon some fresh, young leeks, emphasis upon young. I’d been in a soup mode, and my husband and I were preparing to embark on The Daniel Fast, a strict, nearly vegan diet not so much about the fasting as focusing on God. But that’s another story. Of course, I turned to my handy, faithful Julia Child cookbook, The Way to Cook — one of the best, basic cookbooks I’ve found for delicious eating from your own kitchen. Here’s Julia’s recipe, followed by my variation tonight—which, I must say, yielded a completely satisfying, albeit not vegan, supper.

Leek and Potato Soup
MASTER RECIPE

Here is the mother of the family in all her simplicity. You’ll note there’s no chicken stock here, just water, leeks, potatoes, and salt in the soup base. However, you may include chicken stock if you wish, and you may certainly include milk. A bit of cream at the end is nourishing touch, but by no means a necessity.

4 cups cleaned, sliced leeks — the white part and a bit of the tender green*
4 cups diced potatoes — old or baking potatoes recommended
6 to 7 cups water
1-1/2 to 2 tsp salt, or to taste
1/2 cup or more sour cream, heavy cream, or créme fraîche, optional

Bring the leeks, potatoes, and water to a boil in a heavy-bottomed 3-quart saucepan. Salt lightly, cover partially, and simmer 20 to 30 minutes, or until the vegetables are tender. Taste, and correct seasoning.

That’s it!
______________

Serving au Naturel
Ladle out the soup, and top each serving with a dollop of sour cream, if you wish.

Pureed Leek and Potato Soup
Puree the soup through a vegetable mill,, blender or using an immersion stick blender.

Cream of Leek and Potato Soup
Use a cup less liquid when simmering the soup. After puréeing, whisk in 2/3 cup or more of sour cream, heavy cream, or créme fraîche, simmering a moment to blend.

______________

I told you it was easy.
Tonight, I substituted for the water: 4 cups vegetable broth, 2 cups of water and 1 tsp of concentrated vegetable boullion. The vegetables were tender in to 20 minutes. I puréed the soup with my stick blender and added 2/3 cup heavy cream.

Tiny Thots: My Day in Words & Pictures | 01.16.11

2011-01-16T22:32:00.001-10:00

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My pikake budding and blooming after the rain

The Ko‘olaus

Sunday worship at First Prez Honolulu. A message by my husband on Authenticity.

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Sound byte of Cory Oliveros and the First Prez worship team singing "Just the Way You Are"

Ka‘u oranges from Hawaii's Big Island. The saying goes, the uglier, the sweeter.

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Audio of Tim Keller's sermon "The Problem of Blessing," my third time listening and learning more. | http://thegospelcoalition.org/resources/a/The-Problem-of-Blessing

A full day.

Tiny Thots: A good thought for today: Imagine Me | Kirk Franklin | 01.08.11

2011-01-08T20:29:00.003-10:00

Thanking my son, Dylan, for introducing this song to me today!

Imagine me
Loving what I see when the mirror looks at me cause I
I imagine me
In a place of no insecurities
And I'm finally happy cause
I imagine me

Letting go of all of the ones who hurt me
Cause they never did deserve me
Can you imagine me?
Saying no to thoughts that try to control me
Remembering all you told me
Lord, can you imagine me?
Over what my mama said
And healed from what my daddy did
And I wanna live and not read that page again

[Chorus:]
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally finally I can...
Imagine me
I admit it was hard to see
You being in love with someone like me
But finally I can...
Imagine me

Being strong
And not letting people break me down
You won't get that joy this time around
Can you imagine me?
In a world (in a world) where nobody has to live afraid
Because of your love fears gone away
Can you imagine me?

[Bridge:]
Letting go of my past
And glad I have another chance
And my heart will dance
'Cause I don't have to read that page again

Tiny Thots: A good thought for today: Imagine Me | Kirk Franklin | 01.08.11

2011-01-08T20:29:00.001-10:00

Thanking my son, Dylan, for introducing this song to me today!

Imagine me
Loving what I see when the mirror looks at me cause I
I imagine me
In a place of no insecurities
And I'm finally happy cause
I imagine me

[Chorus:]
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally finally I can...
Imagine me
I admit it was hard to see
You being in love with someone like me
But finally I can...
Imagine me

[Bridge:]
Letting go of my past
And glad I have another chance
And my heart will dance
'Cause I don't have to read that page again

Tiny Thots: Here's why mothers should save their emails | 01.02.11

2011-01-02T20:01:00.001-10:00

An email dated March 10, 2005 describing and quoting my then 10 year old son

Getting into the car with flower for me in hand, "It's hard not to love your mother."

Crispy skinned roast chicken å la Martha Stewart

2010-12-30T18:30:00.001-10:00

Trying my hand at a variation of Martha Stewart’s crispy skinned chicken – basically roasting a chicken sprinkled with 1-1-/2 tablespoons of cornstarch mixed with salt. I like to butterfly my chicken so it will cook faster and brown evenly. I season it on both sides, then broil for 10-12 minutes skin side down until browned, and then flip it skin side up to roast at a high temp (450° - 500°) until done — about 25-35 minutes, or until juices run clear.

*My secret to a great roast chicken: Don’t overcook it!

Tiny Thot: Love never gives up | 12.03.10 #TeensyThot

2010-12-03T10:36:00.001-10:00

1 Corinthians 13 (The Message)

1 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. 2If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. 3-7If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

   Love never gives up.
   Love cares more for others than for self.
   Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
   Love doesn't strut,
   Doesn't have a swelled head,
   Doesn't force itself on others,
   Isn't always "me first,"
   Doesn't fly off the handle,
   Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
   Doesn't revel when others grovel,
   Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
   Puts up with anything,
   Trusts God always,
   Always looks for the best,
   Never looks back,
   But keeps going to the end.

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In the chess game of life, there's often an unseen hand [#teensythot]

2010-11-24T15:19:00.001-10:00

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Tiny Thots: Letting Go | 11.23.10

2010-11-24T00:01:00.001-10:00

It’s hard to let go. But I’m learning.

I’m learning that letting go doesn’t mean dropping, abandoning, or failing. It doesn’t mean you have to rip out a piece of your heart, or nurse a lingering vacuum where whatever you let go used to reside.

If I can picture letting go of something or someone into the hands of God, it becomes a transfer into the hands of someone more trustworthy than I.

If I can release my grip with gratitude, if I can open wide my palm and freely give rather than begrudgingly hand over, I no longer feel robbed and deprived —and, instead, I allow myself to feel blessed.

But why should we let go of objects and people and situations we cherish?
I need to let go because holding anything that close constricts me and seizes the heart.
Letting go frees me up to possibilities that exceed my imagination, ability, and resources.

Letting go lets me be a child who trusts my Father who loves her far more than I ever realized

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Tiny Thots: Keeping friends by knowing when not to speak (Proverbs) | 11.20.10

2010-11-20T23:49:00.001-10:00

Proverbs 11:12-13

12 Those who have no sense deride their neighbors,
but those who have understanding hold their tongues.

13 Gossips betray a confidence,
but the trustworthy keep a secret.

Musings
I was particularly struck by the clear definition of gossip and the use of the strong and emotionally-charged verb “betray.”
Both verses speak about how we react, and specifically about a measured sensitivity to those close to us – neighbors and confidantes – that instructs us to use wise restraint. This kind of wisdom builds relationships through patient, empathic understanding, rather than tears them down.

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Control is the ultimate illusion [#teensythot]

2010-11-18T18:09:00.001-10:00

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Tiny Thots: Specks, sawdust, planks, shortcuts and passwords (a not too tiny thot) | 11.18.10

2010-11-18T13:06:00.001-10:00

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The world around us is full of judgment:
You did this. I saw you do that. You lied, you half-lied, you knew better, you cheated. That was wrong. You were less than honest.

If we’re not getting that from others, we’re throwing that at others. Or maybe we do hear it and throw it back in a vicious, mud-slinging, name smearing, last-one-standing-must be- right fight.

We disguise our judgment in expertise, research, intelligence and the words, “I’m doing this for your own good.” But what good does it do? It creates guilt, a sense of failure, recrimination, a critical spirit that breeds on itself.

Two things came to mind this morning:

The words of Jesus as recorded in the Gospel of Matthew, chapter 7 where he talks about the specks of sawdust we see in others’ eyes and the planks of wood in our eyes.

And a Hillsong song, “From the Inside Out.”

I’m not sure what one has to do with the other, but I’ll try to articulate it. Somehow, I can give up judging and start loving, really caring for others as they should be cared for and thought of, as I should care for them in order for me to do the greatest good for them and for myself— when I become BOTH fully aware of my shortcomings (my specks and planks) AND God’s grace.

Pastor Tim Keller of Redeemer Church in New York City talks about knowing God’s grace this way: Never do we find God’s grace unless something has gotten to us to see our weakness, our insufficiency, our flawedness, our sin, our neediness.

In this way of thinking, my flaws become my crack in the door to grace. My door slammed shut to protect myself from the onslaught of others, hidiing behind my nailed-together planks so that I can launch a thousand arrows in return — I can’t, I won’t, let grace in. In The Message version of Matthew 7, Eugene Peterson talks about passwords. My life should not be password-protected…except, except, except by one word:

Grace.

“A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace.

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame

My heart and my soul, I give You control
Consume me from the inside out, Lord
Let justice and praise, become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
From the Inside Out ~ Hillsong

Matthew 7 paraphrased by Eugene Peterson in “The Message” version of the New Testament

A Simple Guide for Behavior
1-5 "Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It's easy to see a smudge on your neighbor's face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, 'Let me wash your face for you,' when your own face is distorted by contempt? It's this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

6"Don't be flip with the sacred. Banter and silliness give no honor to God. Don't reduce holy mysteries to slogans. In trying to be relevant, you're only being cute and inviting sacrilege.

7-11"Don't bargain with God. Be direct. Ask for what you need. This isn't a cat-and-mouse, hide-and-seek game we're in. If your child asks for bread, do you trick him with sawdust? If he asks for fish, do you scare him with a live snake on his plate? As bad as you are, you wouldn't think of such a thing. You're at least decent to your own children. So don't you think the God who conceived you in love will be even better?

12"Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them. Add up God's Law and Prophets and this is what you get.

Being and Doing
13-14"Don't look for shortcuts to God. The market is flooded with surefire, easygoing formulas for a successful life that can be practiced in your spare time. Don't fall for that stuff, even though crowds of people do. The way to life—to God!—is vigorous and requires total attention.

15-20"Be wary of false preachers who smile a lot, dripping with practiced sincerity. Chances are they are out to rip you off some way or other. Don't be impressed with charisma; look for character. Who preachers are is the main thing, not what they say. A genuine leader will never exploit your emotions or your pocketbook. These diseased trees with their bad apples are going to be chopped down and burned.

21-23"Knowing the correct password—saying 'Master, Master,' for instance— isn't going to get you anywhere with me. What is required is serious obedience—doing what my Father wills. I can see it now—at the Final Judgment thousands strutting up to me and saying, 'Master, we preached the Message, we bashed the demons, our God-sponsored projects had everyone talking.' And do you know what I am going to say? 'You missed the boat. All you did was use me to make yourselves important. You don't impress me one bit. You're out of here.'

24-25"These words I speak to you are not incidental additions to your life, homeowner improvements to your standard of living. They are foundational words, words to build a life on. If you work these words into your life, you are like a smart carpenter who built his house on solid rock. Rain poured down, the river flooded, a tornado hit—but nothing moved that house. It was fixed to the rock.

26-27"But if you just use my words in Bible studies and don't work them into your life, you are like a stupid carpenter who built his house on the sandy beach. When a storm rolled in and the waves came up, it collapsed like a house of cards."

28-29When Jesus concluded his address, the crowd burst into applause. They had never heard teaching like this. It was apparent that he was living everything he was saying—quite a contrast to their religion teachers! This was the best teaching they had ever heard.

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Tiny Thots: Spoken and heard | 11.15.10

2010-11-15T11:37:00.001-10:00

What I'm hearing today:

¹¹ One thing God has spoken,
two things have I heard:
that you, O God, are strong,
¹² and that you, O Lord, are loving. Psalm 62:11-12

One decision can change the way you look at the whole day and every day after.

"Life is not about easy but about trust." - my friend Margie

Musing about Psalm 62 - when God speaks his word, we can hear both his strength and his love. How often in human voices do we only hear one or the other, or see one overcome by the other? Exhibited, combined and simultaneous strength and love is an attribute of God that becomes incorporated into our marrow and muscle as we draw closer and closer to him.

Given that, whenever a decision within the scope of our lives is made in good faith that earnestly looks for God's guidance, we can trust God's strength and love — despite the way that decision may dramatically alter how I see future before me. Again, as Margie so wisely said, "Life is not about easy but about trust." If I know God's strength and love, then I have every reason to trust.

Jeremiah 29:11 — For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Psalm 62

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

¹ My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
² He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

³ How long will you assault a man?
   Would all of you throw him down—
   this leaning wall, this tottering fence?
⁴ They fully intend to topple him
   from his lofty place;
   they take delight in lies.
With their mouths they bless,
   but in their hearts they curse. Selah

⁵ Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
   my hope comes from him.
⁶ He alone is my rock and my salvation;
   he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
⁷ My salvation and my honor depend on God;
   he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
⁸ Trust in him at all times, O people;
   pour out your hearts to him,
   for God is our refuge. Selah

⁹ Lowborn men are but a breath,
   the highborn are but a lie;
if weighed on a balance, they are nothing;
   together they are only a breath.
¹⁰ Do not trust in extortion
   or take pride in stolen goods;
though your riches increase,
   do not set your heart on them.

¹¹ One thing God has spoken,
two things have I heard:
that you, O God, are strong,
¹² and that you, O Lord, are loving.
Surely you will reward each person
according to what he has done.

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Tiny Thots: Family | 11.13.10

2010-11-13T12:18:00.001-10:00

Reminded to pray for my family by this photo of my youngest son with my uncle, taken April 2009. My uncle is the second brother and sole survivor from my dad’s family of four brothers. Uncle Hong was 85 when the photo was taken. There’s a lot of kindness and love in my dad’s family – quiet ways of relating to one another through acts of giving passed down from generation to generation. I see that in my uncle’s eyes. I am reminded of where I came from and how much we have to pass on.

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Tiny Thots: Beautiful Exchange | 11.12.10

2010-11-12T08:16:00.001-10:00

via youtube.com

You were near,
Though I was distant
Disillusioned
I was lost and insecure

Still mercy fought
For my attention
You were waiting at the door,
Then I let You in

Trading Your life
For my offenses
For my redemption
You carried all the blame

Breaking the curse
Of our condition
Perfection took our place

When only love
Could make a way
You gave Your life
In a beautiful exchange

My burden erase,
My life forgiven
There is nothing
That could take this love away

My only desire
And sole ambition
Is to love You just the same

Holy are You God
Holy is Your name
With everything I’ve got
My heart will sing how I love You

- Hillsong 2010

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Tiny Thots: An undivided heart | 11.10.10

2010-11-10T21:10:00.001-10:00

Psalm 86:11-13

11 Teach me your way, LORD,
   that I may rely on your faithfulness;
give me an undivided heart,
   that I may fear your name.
12 I will praise you, Lord my God, with all my heart;
   I will glorify your name forever.
13 For great is your love toward me;
   you have delivered me from the depths,
   from the realm of the dead.

New International Version]

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Tiny Thots: Yoke's on me | 11.08.10

2010-11-08T19:45:00.001-10:00

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30

Jesus was right. It was much easier and better wearing his yoke today than plowing through life fiercely determined on my own.

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Tiny Thots: Surrender | 11.06.10

2010-11-06T07:48:00.001-10:00

Starting my day by trying to empty everything out so that You can fill it, Lord.

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Tiny Thots: Nothing in This World | 10.31.10

2010-10-31T08:48:00.001-10:00

I wake up most mornings with a song in my head. Today's is "Nothing in This World" by Tim Hughes - good thoughts on my way to Sunday worship this morning.

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Tiny Thots: Lamenting | 10.30.10

2010-10-30T22:59:00.001-10:00

From God on Mute, by Pete Greig (Regal Books, 2007), p 85

Lamenting is more than a technique for venting emotion. It is one of the fruits of a deepening spiritual life that hs learned to stand naked before God without shame or pretence. In fact long before Gethsemane, Jesus Himself had pronounced that those who mourn are blessed (see Matt 5:4)? “Implicit in this statement notes Walter Brueggermann “is that those who do not mourn will not be comforted and those who do not face the endings will not receive the beginnings.” Honest lament can express a vibrant faith; one that has learned to embrace life’s hardships as well its joy and to lift everything — everything — to the Father in prayers. As the author Richard Foster says of the lament psalms, “They give us permission to shake our fist at God one moment and break into doxology the next.”

Walter Brueggermann quoted from The Prophetic Imagination, Fortress Press, 2001, p 57
Richard Foster quoted from Prayer: Finding the Heart’s True Home, Harper-San Francisco 1992, p 24.

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Tiny Thots: Really | 10.21.10

2010-10-28T10:56:00.001-10:00

Do you-we-I allow people to be real? Really? Or do we stop them short of saying what they really feel, being who they really are…because it’s inconvenient, uncomfortable, unmanageable? I’m not talking about strangers, but friends – people we rub shoulders with regularly, daily. What would happen if we let them be real? How would we feel if we were allowed to be real?

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Tiny Thots: Speaking up } 16 Oct 2010

2010-10-16T17:52:00.001-10:00

“If people cannot speak about their affliction they will be destroyed by it, or swallowed up by apathy…without the capacity to communicate with others there can be no change. To become speechless, to be totally without any relationship, that is death.”

—Dorothee Solle, Suffering, quoted by Pete Greig in his book God on Mute, p 71

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"Chasing Rainbows" | Hawaii Film Festival selection

2010-10-11T16:52:00.001-10:00

via chasingrainbowsfilm.com

Excerpted from the site:

The Film

The battle between mainstream conservatives and the homosexual movement in America all started in Hawaii in the 1990s with the first lawsuit from a same sex couple suing a state over the right to marry.
Synopsis

Hawaii is still on the verge of joining several other states in adopting a same sex union law. HB 444, the Hawaii Civil Unions bill, generated tremendous controversy in our state. It is an issue that is dividing churches, families, generations and many in the workplace. Are a select few in our population pushing an agenda that if passed on the short term, will affect how the vast majority of us live out our lives in the long term?

We took a look at a number of profound questions in the search for answers:

What is a civil union, and how does it differ from marriage? Is this a religious, civil rights or political issue? Does a bill for civil unions represent the vast majority of the people’s needs? Who are the driving forces behind this movement and why is it so important to them?

Is being gay or straight a personal preference, an environmental influence, a hereditary or predetermined genetic factor? Are homosexuals in fact seeking equal rights and benefits under the law, or are they rather seeking to normalize and sanctify same-sex partner relationships and elevate those relationships to a plateau with the same legal and moral status of a heterosexual marriage? And why is Hawaii so pivotal in setting the standard for the rest of the nation?

Is this strictly a constitutional issue? What will be the long-term outcome from such civil unions or same sex marriage in the United States? How will it affect the traditional marriage, the traditional family? Can it possibly change the fabric of our society, as we know it today? And more importantly, what do established academically certified research studies tell us about these issues?

We explored the hard facts behind what’s driving the civil unions and same sex movement across America, who’s involved and why they believe what they believe. We took a fair and impartial look at each of the components involved in the proposed civil unions law and how they might affect Hawaii. And along the way, we met with the many people and factions that are for or against such a law and heard why they have taken the stance they do.

We talked with the legislators and others who crafted and introduced the civil unions bill and those who vehemently opposed it. We talked with clergy on both sides of the issue and examined their differing views.

We chatted with professional psychologists and legal experts to try and determine the effects of a civil unions law. We looked at what has happened in other states and bring you revealing stories from people who have been impacted by similar laws.

In Chasing Rainbows we meet, spend time with and get to know a few of the people in Hawaii that would benefit from such a law – and along the way we ask you, the people of America, what you know, think and believe, and why.

In Chasing Rainbows we take you down a fact-finding path in search of the truth. It’s our goal to be accountable to you and provide a fair, unbiased and detailed view of all the issues involved. In the end it will be up to you to decide just how you feel about civil unions and same-sex marriage, but we’ll warn you: the truth may be surprising.

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Tiny Thots: Love and Forgiveness | 17 Sept 2010

2010-09-17T22:19:00.001-10:00

Can one truly love without forgiveness or forgive without love? I don’t know. But I’m going for both.

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Tiny Thots: Elephant Skin | 09.09.10

2010-09-09T21:27:00.001-10:00

Early in his journey as a pastor, my husband was asked by his senior pastor about how he handled criticism and situations that personally impacted him. “Not well,” my husband said. “I’m very sensitive.” His senior pastor responded with a slap on the back and these words: “Well, we’re going to help you develop tough skin, elephant skin.”

For years since then, I’ve always thought that was what was happening to us, to me. That as challenging, sensitive, soul-piercing, anger-rising, tear-invoking situations came our way, we were developing tough elephant skin. I believed I could rely upon scars and calluses that I couldn’t see to protect me from the hurts and sorrows of life that people shared continuously with us.

I realized this week, I’ve been wrong. It’s not the scars and calluses that make me able to bear up better in the journey of life. It’s the wounds.

I don’t feel less. I don’t experience less pain. I’m not less affected by others’ situations. Things don’t roll off my back.

I feel more. I cry more. I hurt more deeply.

Every new wound— feeling the pain of life and always and again experiencing something that cuts deeper into my heart than I’ve felt before — makes me better able to feel for others. I am a better person even in the hurt that I don’t want or ask for. Wounds help me be compassionate, patient and loving. They show me my humanness, my “wretchedness,” as Paul describes it in Romans 7:24.

Wounds enlarge my heart because I can feel deeper. And when I do that, I let more of others in. I let more of God in: God in His love, God and His Presence, God and His mercy and forgiveness which heals the wounds and doesn’t allow the heart to break.

I’m understanding better now when scripture describes Jesus as “a man of sorrow and who was acquainted with grief” [Isaiah 53:3]:

But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed.

This is a love that doesn’t grow by having calluses that develop over the wounds, but out of woundedness itself.
© Pamela A. Chun | 9 September 2010

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Tiny Thots: Judgment vs. Discernment | 09.08.10

2010-09-08T10:59:00.001-10:00

The difference between being judgmental and being discerning:
A judgmental attitude wants to exact punishment for a final outcome, while a discerning attitude holds compassion at its center.

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Reminded by Israel Houghton that "nothing surprises you, Jesus."

2010-09-07T10:28:00.001-10:00

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Surprises
Featuring Fred Hammond

From first to last
You knew my days
Future and past
You saw everything
When I would fail
When I would win
When I would
Grace to start again

NOTHING SURPRISES YOU
NOTHING SURPRISES YOU ABOUT ME, JESUS
NOTHING THAT I COULD DO
NOTHING COULD SEPARATE YOU FROM ME
YOU SEE ME, YOU KNOW ME, YOU LOVE ME
MADLY

Cover my life
Order my steps
I follow Christ
My answer’s yes
Sometimes I rise
And sometimes I’ll fall
So glad Your love is unconditional

You’re not mad at me
You’re not mad at me
You’re more than enough
You’re madly in love with me

Meleasa Houghton and Israel Houghton © 2010

Find it on @IsraelNewBreed's new album "Love God. Love People." http://bit.ly/LOVEGOD

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Listening to: Whole World in His Hands | Tim Hughes

2010-08-28T10:47:00.001-10:00

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A good reminder anytime, anywhere.

Whole World in His Hands

When all around is fading
And nothing seems to last
When each day is filled with sorrow
Still I know with all my heart

[chorus]
He's got the whole world in His hands
He's got the whole world in His hands
I fear no evil, for You are with me
Strong to deliver, mighty to save
He's got the whole world in His hands

When I walk through fire
I will not be burned
When the waves come crashing round me
Still I know with all my heart

Music/Lyrics by Tim Hughes

http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/whole-world-in-his-hands/id23201256?i=23201228

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Agree with your adversary quickly . . . Matthew 5:25

2010-06-30T11:23:00.001-10:00

From June 30th reading from My Utmost for My Highest. [ http://utmost.org/do-it-now/], Oswald Chambers writes:

In this verse, Jesus Christ laid down a very important principle by saying, “Do what you know you must do— now. Do it quickly. If you don’t, an inevitable process will begin to work ’till you have paid the last penny’ ( Matthew 5:26) in pain, agony, and distress.”

I have been thinking a lot lately about disagreements with others and how we handle them.

It seems that the easiest way is to handle them so in the way we are most accustomed. If we come from a family of lawyers, we might sue or seek legal mediation. If we come from a culture of fighting, how easy it would be to take outside and settle it by brute force. If we come from an environment of shame and hiding, we may prefer not saying anything, closing our eyes, retreating and just waiting for it all to fade, pass, and hopefully be forgotten.

In a way, those modes are the “easiest” way of handling matters. Someone wins. Someone loses. But someone and maybe both parties are also hurt — and there is no reconciliation. There is only right and wrong seen from a personal, subjective point of view guarded carefully and never truly put to rest.

But God through Jesus calls us to another way. To forgive.

In every situation, there is plenty of blame to go around. There is plenty enough hurt to be pounded into another’s heart. And blaming, accusing, hurting, pointing fingers and guarding one’s own territory just leads to fences which become walls which become silos of isolation.

Jesus calls us to forgive because that is the only way to break down barriers that keep us separated from one another. We can’t love unless we extend forgiveness. We can’t feel loved unless we receive forgiveness. Forgiveness says that you, I, we as a relationship are more important than being right.

So as not to say that I’ve got this under wraps and know to how approach my own adversaries in a neat, tidy, squeaky clean fashion — let me admit outright that this is something I’m working. I say working on because the process — the many steps and paths — of forgiveness is painful. It’s not easy. Because when I’m working on reconciling, it requires that I take time to understand myself first. It’s not solely about the persons on the other side of the fence; it’s as much about me. It takes an enormous amount of soul work and self-examination and vulnerability. It means being raw and honest with myself. It requires taking me to the point where my right to who I am is not as important and valuable as the relationship. It demands God digging around in me to show that his greatness, his spaciousness gives me the capacity to allow differences to be just that: differences and not condemnations or judgment or expectation.

If I want to love someone else, I have to love for them for who they are and not for who I want them to be. I cannot want them to my image of them, which would in effect be an image of myself. If I have to insist on being right all the time and not forgiving, my world becomes a very lonely place.

Would we make it our mission to not have adversaries but instead work on restoration

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Notes on temptation

2010-05-25T18:51:00.001-10:00

From the Life Application Study Bible, Matthew 4

A person has not shown true obedience if he or she has never had an opportunity to disobey

Because we know that testing will come, we should be alert and ready for it. Remember, your convictions are only strong if they hold up under pressure.

Although we may feel dirty after being tempted, we should remember that temptation itself is not sin. We sin when we give in and disobey God.

Satan often tempts us when we are vulnerable — when we are under physical or emotional stress (for example, lonely, tired, weighing big decisions, or faced with uncertainty).

But Satan also like to tempt us through our strengths, where we are most susceptible to pride.

Jesus knows firsthand what we are experiencing, and he is willing and able to help us in our struggles. We are tempted, turn to him for strength.

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Been jumpin' to all weekend: Israel Houghton | Just Wanna' Say | Music Video

2010-02-15T13:40:00.001-10:00

via youtube.com

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Untitled

2010-01-31T23:05:00.001-10:00

via Seesmic

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I'm standing with my heart abandoned ♪♫♪

2010-01-15T13:22:00.001-10:00

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Standing

You’re the giver of all things
You’re the source I find my strength
You’re the kindness in my eyes
The hope that lives inside

You’re the grace for all my tears
The boldness for my fears
You’re the laughter in my smile
You’re everything to me

I’m standing
With my heart abandoned
I freely make my life
Completely yours

You’re the faith for all my doubt
You’re the name that I cry out, Jesus
The joy of my desire
You’re my passion, you’re my fire

I’m standing
With my heart abandoned
I freely make my life
Completely yours

I’m standing waiting on your presence
I freely make my life
Completely yours
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh!

Bridge
The world around me fades away
In the fullness of your face
The world around me fades away
In the fullness of your face
It fades away

I’m standing with my heart abandoned
I freely make my life
Completely yours
I’m standing waiting on your presence
I freely make my life
Completely yours

Highlands Worship | Church of the Highlands
http://www.highlandsworship.com/

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Lying with the shepherd

2010-01-12T08:24:00.001-10:00

An “experiment” from Jan Johnson, out of the book Renovation of the Heart in Daily Practice <http://www.amazon.com/Renovation-Heart-Daily-Practice-Transformation/dp/1576838099/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1263319822&sr=8-1> , co-authored with Dallas Willard:

Quiet yourself and try to truly believe the ideas in Psalm 23:1-3 <http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2023&version=NIV> . Picture this sheep who is surrounded by green pastures yet isn’t on his feet munching way. This sheep is so full and satisfied that he contentedly lies down without needing even a bite. Move through the verses in a way such as this (fill in the blanks with details from your life):

Maybe the Lord really is my shepherd today. Perhaps I really do have everything I need, even when it comes to __________________. The Lord will provide me green pastures, even though I may not recognize them at first. I may think that what I need is missing, but it will be there. I’ll figure that out faster if I rest (Lie down) in God. The still waters are there for me to drink form any minute I need them. In certain events today, such as _______________, I may need them frequently.
God is restoring my broken soul today. It is healthier than ever. When I become confused today, God will guide me in the right path. Again, I may not recognize it until later, but I can trust God’s name, God’s presence, and God’s power in my life today.

Psalm 23 A psalm of David.
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
       through the valley of the shadow of death,
       I will fear no evil,
       for you are with me;
       your rod and your staff,
       they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
       in the presence of my enemies.
       You anoint my head with oil;
       my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
       all the days of my life,
       and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
       forever.

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You Are Great (audio) | John Larson

2010-01-07T12:35:00.001-10:00

You Are Great (5261 KB)
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http://www.johnlarsonmusic.com

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Eye of the Needle | January 3, 2010

2010-01-03T00:05:00.001-10:00

One of the joys of my mid-day lap swim workouts is catching glimpses of the skies above. Lucky for me, I not only live in Hawai‘i but swim in a 50-meter outdoor pool near the back of a gorgeous, green valley. Each time I turn to breathe, I can see the ridges of the mountains and, above them, skies that almost always float with clouds being pushed forward by winds blowing them out to sea. When a friend moved here recently from the mainland, he commented, “Hawai‘i is the cloudiest place I know.” That struck me as odd—at first. I always thought of Hawai‘i as having clear, blue skies, forgetting about the puffs of white cotton that do always dot our skies, that bring sudden sprinkles of rain that we shake off within minutes and keep our islands green, that filter the burning rays of an otherwise unrelenting tropical sun, that play across the skies in innumerable shapes, sizes, wisps, towers, sheets, and layers, and which at the end of the day lay themselves out as canvas for the setting sun to splay its palette of colors before dipping below the horizon. I suppose that because clouds always fill our skies, I’ve come to see the clouds as sky itself, inseparable. I don’t know the sky without them.

Last week when I was swimming, I caught a hole in the clouds — not an ordinary hole, mind you, in which the cloud had thinned or separated or was being blow apart. This was a triangular hole seemingly cut out of a thick wad of cumulus cloud, more akin to a keyhole because of its geometric symmetry and the uniformly deep frame around it as if someone had purposefully rendered it to showcase the vivid blue sky that lay behind. Was I to look at the cloud or the hole? The composition of the clouds or what lay beyond, what was more fascinating— the foreground or the background? I suppose I couldn’t have the one without the other.

And then it seemed as if I were peering through to something beyond, heaven perhaps. Not a keyhole, but a peephole. Not a peephole, but a portal, an opening, a way in. I was on one side, and something lay, waiting beyond, on the other side.

And that is so God. God is always all about openings. That’s all he ever does in our lives. He creates openings for us to walk through and see the other side, his side, a side we can’t comprehend unless we step through to the other side.

I think of the eye of the needle…
And a rich young ruler. Here’s the story told in the Gospel of Luke (Luke 18:18-27):

A certain ruler asked him, "Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?"

"Why do you call me good?" Jesus answered. "No one is good—except God alone. You know the commandments: 'Do not commit adultery, do not murder, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honor your father and mother.'" "All these I have kept since I was a boy," he said.

When Jesus heard this, he said to him, "You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

When he heard this, he became very sad, because he was a man of great wealth. Jesus looked at him and said, "How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God! Indeed, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."

Those who heard this asked, "Who then can be saved?"

Jesus replied, "What is impossible with men is possible with God."

You know, for years I always got caught up in this story with the camel that can’t get through the eye of the needle. It’s the same place those who heard Jesus first get caught up, too—in trying to push a big, fat, hairy, stubborn camel through the eye of a needle. Ridiculous. And Jesus says it’s easier to do that than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. So in my mind’s eye, I leave the rich man outside the gates of God’s kingdom—I don’t even try to get him through—because Jesus says there’s an easy way to thread a camel through a needle. I’m unloading the camel, squishing it, flattening it, experimenting with hooves in first or the bristly hairs atop its nose.

And I forget two things, no three:
1.    It’s impossible with men
2.    It’s possible with God
3.    The eye of the needle

The first means, I should just forget even trying. The second means that because it’s impossible and no man or woman can do it, God can. And the third simply reminds me that the reason the camel can get through is that the eye of a needle is a hole, a passageway – a passage, a way.

The eye of the needle reminds me that when I have no way, when I can’t find a way out of a situation nor into a better place (God’s kingdom), I have to look to God to show me a hole, the very sliver of a hole through which he can draw me. When God creates a way, anything is possible.

It’s called grace—being given access to the humanly impossible because God makes divinely possible. Grace, in other words, is simply God showing us a hole in the clouds, God making a way, God opening the door when we thought it slammed shut, God unlocking the gate when we thought our entrance was barred. It’s God reaching through from his side and tearing our worlds apart so that we can enter the Kingdom.

It’s amazing what you can think of while taking a breath while swimming.

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Other places God's been at work: Three ways to keep you ego in check (John Baldoni of Harvard Business Review)

2009-12-17T14:57:00.001-10:00

This great post from John Baldoni of the Harvard Business Review is, not coincidentally, where God has been speaking to me — basically keeping my strengths and my self in check, not overstepping my bounds, being realistic, and allowing others to help me.

Three Ways to Keep Your Ego in Check

"It's okay if other people think you're God, but you're in trouble if you start believing it."

David Cornwell, a sports attorney, recalled that quote as one uttered by his father, a surgeon. While Cornwell was speaking on <http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0912/02/lkl.01.html> Larry King Live about Tiger Woods' foibles <http://blogs.harvardbusiness.org/hbr/hbreditors/2009/12/scandal_catches_tiger_by_the_t.html> , the quote has relevance to anyone in a leadership position, not just doctors and big name athletes.

Sure, leaders have to believe in themselves — otherwise no one else will. Their conviction in their own abilities has to be strong as well as resilient, but such self-assurance cannot be allowed to become arrogance. So often when we see business leaders making poor decisions it seems as if their ego is speaking louder than their voice of reason.

And yet we need to remember that, while it's easy to throw stones at people and power, and lampoon their outsized egos when they stumble, so often that outsize ego is the result of the relentless fawning of others. You do not rise to power without followers, but if that followership is more sycophantic than supportive, the leader can lose his bearings.

Keeping your ego in check is an exercise in humility, with the emphasis on the word exercise, so here are a few tips:

Accept praise, but never believe it totally. Ancient Romans had a tradition of welcoming home victorious military commanders with a state-sponsored procession that included the commander riding in his chariot. Legend has it <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_triumph> that a slave standing next to him would hold a golden laurel above his head and whisper into his ear, "Remember you are mortal." True or not, it is a good lesson for anyone who achieves success to remind himself that success is earned, not bestowed. You need to keep earning it.

Listen to your best friend. While the word "friendship" may have become diluted in this era of social media mouse-clicking, the relationship between people who know and respect each other remains essential. Such friends (be they spouses or colleagues) are not afraid to give each other the straight dope. Senior leaders need the friendship of one or two close associates whom they trust above others to tell them the truth. Treasure those friendships.

Reflect on your shortcomings. Taking time out to gain perspective on what you are doing is valuable. In the Catholic tradition, penitents are taught to go through an examination of conscience, reflecting on their transgressions. A frank look at what you have done wrong, as it applies to decisions made, behaviors exerted, and treatment of others is vital to a leader keeping his head on straight. Too much dwelling on the negative is not good, but a frank assessment of shortcomings is advised.

Ego affirms a leader's ability to take charge. But checking the ego demonstrates a leader's ability to take charge of himself. That is critical to developing strong organizations which can achieve sustainable results.

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God's been working on my insides

2009-12-16T11:37:00.001-10:00

God's been working on my insides, renovating me, helping me to grow more in the ways He wants me to grow, and not just in the ways I think I should grow. He’s been speaking through some difficult circumstances, hard and challenging situations, through conversations with friends who love me, through introspection, books, sermons —and this scripture from 2 Peter 1:2-11. He’s lovingly asking me to move in His direction, and keeping me in close company when it’s been more difficult than I’ve liked. But He’s gentle and patient and good and sees my heart and loves me anyway.

Here are three versions of the same passage. Perhaps God has a message for you, too.

2 Peter 1:2-11 (New International Version)

2Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord.

3His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. 8For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.

10Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall, 11and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

New Living Translation
2 May God give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus our Lord.

3 By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know him, the one who called us to himself by means of his marvelous glory and excellence. 4 And because of his glory and excellence, he has given us great and precious promises. These are the promises that enable you to share his divine nature and escape the world’s corruption caused by human desires.

5 In view of all this, make every effort to respond to God’s promises. Supplement your faith with a generous provision of moral excellence, and moral excellence with knowledge, 6 and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with patient endurance, and patient endurance with godliness, 7 and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love for everyone.

8 The more you grow like this, the more productive and useful you will be in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 But those who fail to develop in this way are shortsighted or blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their old sins.

10 So, dear brothers and sisters, work hard to prove that you really are among those God has called and chosen. Do these things, and you will never fall away. 11 Then God will give you a grand entrance into the eternal Kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

The Message
1-2 I, Simon Peter, am a servant and apostle of Jesus Christ. I write this to you whose experience with God is as life-changing as ours, all due to our God's straight dealing and the intervention of our God and Savior, Jesus Christ. Grace and peace to you many times over as you deepen in your experience with God and Jesus, our Master.

3-4 Everything that goes into a life of pleasing God has been miraculously given to us by getting to know, personally and intimately, the One who invited us to God. The best invitation we ever received! We were also given absolutely terrific promises to pass on to you—your tickets to participation in the life of God after you turned your back on a world corrupted by lust.

5-9 So don't lose a minute in building on what you've been given, complementing your basic faith with good character, spiritual understanding, alert discipline, passionate patience, reverent wonder, warm friendliness, and generous love, each dimension fitting into and developing the others. With these qualities active and growing in your lives, no grass will grow under your feet, no day will pass without its reward as you mature in your experience of our Master Jesus. Without these qualities you can't see what's right before you, oblivious that your old sinful life has been wiped off the books.

10-11 So, friends, confirm God's invitation to you, his choice of you. Don't put it off; do it now. Do this, and you'll have your life on a firm footing, the streets paved and the way wide open into the eternal kingdom of our Master and Savior, Jesus Christ.

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The blessing of friends

2009-11-20T22:53:00.001-10:00

I’ve been thinking a lot about friends lately and the riches that lie in good friends that stand with us in every situation. They are the people that hold us up when we’re too tired to go a step further. They are the people who sit with us through the darkness and the night. They are the ones who call out our names when we are groping in a haze of confusion, who remind us of who we are at our essence and at our core. They are the ones that laugh with us, celebrate with us, and count our blessings with us. Thank God for friends. They are part of who we are.

Here’s what Proverbs says about friends like these.

Proverbs 17:17 (The Message)
Friends love through all kinds of weather,
and families stick together in all kinds of trouble.

Proverbs 18:24 (The Message)
Friends come and friends go,
but a true friend sticks by you like family.

Proverbs 27:6 (New International Version)
Wounds from a friend can be trusted,
but an enemy multiplies kisses.

Proverbs 27:9 (New International Version)
Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart,
and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel.

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Regina Brett's 45 life lessons and 5 to grow on

2009-11-20T20:01:00.001-10:00

A friend passed this on to me today. Words of wisdom, something for every and any day, written by Regina Brett.

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.
It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:

Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
When in doubt, just take the next small step.
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Pay off your credit cards every month.
You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
It's OK to let your children see you cry.
Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
Overprepare, then go with the flow.
Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
The most important sex organ is the brain.
No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
Always choose life.
Forgive everyone everything.
What other people think of you is none of your business.
Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
Believe in miracles.
God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.
Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
The best is yet to come.
No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
If you don't ask, you don't get.
Yield.
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Originally published in The Plain Dealer on Sunday, May 28, 2006
Learn more about Regina at http://www.reginabrett.com/

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You can't change anybody

2009-11-20T09:34:00.001-10:00

“I came to realize that really I can’t change anybody. I could counsel with them, I could coach them, I could lead them, I could hold up the mirror for them and everything. But ultimately change has to come from them. It dawned on me that if they didn’t change themselves, if they didn’t have the desire and the will to change I couldn’t change them.”

Don Soderquist quoted in George Barna’s newest book, Master Leaders, Barna © 2009, p 2
[ http://www.barna.org/barna-update/article/5-barna-update/315-30-respected-leaders-weigh-in-on-what-it-takes-to-be-a-master-leader]

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Nov 2-3, Days 16 & 17: True faith

2009-11-03T15:50:00.001-10:00

Thinking on this quote from Philip Yancey’s book:

If we insist on visible proofs from God we may well prepare the way for a permanent state of disappointment. True faith does not so much attempt to manipulate God to do our will as it does to position us to do God’s will.

From Disappointment with God, p 242
http://www.amazon.com/Disappointment-God-Philip-Yancey/dp/031021436X

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Oct 31-Nov 1, Days 14 & 15: How to be blessed

2009-11-02T00:01:00.001-10:00

A few random thoughts on how to receive blessings from God.

Make sure that our cup is not already full – not overflowing with things that we have added to our lives.
If we find that our lives are too crowded, make room for God – off load some of the stuff.
The best place to insert God’s blessing is in our hearts.
Sometimes blessing comes in through our ears
Recognize our needs and admit that we are not sufficient for meeting all of them by ourselves.
Forgive someone; that’s also a good way to offload stuff and create more space in our lives.
Be willing to experiment. Risk a little something for God, then risk a little something more.
Have a sense of humor. Lighten up. God’s blessing may not originally look how you expect it to look.
Practice gratitude. Every time, every thing we are thankful for becomes a blessing if we stop to see the value.
Don’t keep an eye on other people’s blessing. That’s for them and not for you.
Rejoice in your relationships.
Celebrate everything you see that is good.
Relax.
Don’t design your own blessings. God is not a Build-a-Blessing Workshop.
Try it on for size.
Smile. Laugh.
Cry and let God wipe your tears.
Share your life with others.
Dream. Imagine. Consider the miraculous.
Open up your hands, unclench your fists.
Be generous.
Rest in Him.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 29-30, Days 12 & 13: The Element of Surprise

2009-10-31T00:31:00.002-10:00

The best plots contain the element of surprise. Whether it be a mystery novel, an animated cartoon, a poem, a movie, sonnet, or a personal relationship – those that have an unexpected turn for the better or for the worst, always keep us glued to our seats.

And so it is true for the Gospels, indeed for the whole Bible. It is also true for our lives. God is a god of surprises, who takes the impossible and makes it a moment in time that can stretch across generations. God knows that had we no surprises we would have no joy – and joy is at the heart or blessings.

Have you ever experienced blessings that were expected. Or, let me put it this way if you thought a blessing was coming, once it did come as a blessing, was it just the way you had played it out in your mind…or was it even better?!

Here’s a what Jesus said about those who would be blessed:

Matthew 5:1-12 (The Beatitudes)

1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach them saying:
3"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

These are the people whom we would least expected to receiving blessing…for the very reason that they are blessed: They are poor, they mourn, they are hungry and thirsty, they are persecuted. God always turns the tables. It’s not because we don’t deserve blessing. God’s blessing is totally “his,” and the blessing is not based on our expectations, criteria, or demands. Blessings are not something we can earn or strive for, only something conferred upon us in surprising unanticipated volume, form, timing, qualitiy and extraordinariness.

How has God surprised you today? If it’s come from his hand, it is a blessing, and always a blessing in surprise.

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 28, Day 11: Who Am I [Casting Crowns]

2009-10-28T11:10:00.001-10:00

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Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 27, Day 10: Earth shaking blessings

2009-10-27T23:41:00.001-10:00

In the Bible, in chapter 4 of the Book of Acts, we read of one of those literally earth-shaking events experienced by the early Church:

[31] After they [the apostles Peter and John] prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly. [32] All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had. [33] With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God's grace was so powerfully at work in them all [34] that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales [35] and put it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.

Most people in the church today are familiar with this passage as a model for living in community as followers of Jesus Christ: being one in heart and mind, sharing possessions, meeting each others’ needs. Isn’t that our ideal and goal to live in such harmony and with mutual love for one another? It certainly is mine. The world would be such a better place if we did.

However, it was not until rereading this passage today that I realized I had missed the first point, the first goal the preempts and predicates the goal of living in community. It is this in verse 33: And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all.

God’s Grace. That is the key, the engine, the nuclear power that drives blessing – and not our good intentions or understanding, compassion, mercy, kindness, or love. Blessing does not start with us. Blessing starts with God and His grace working powerfully in us. It is His grace that turns our world upside down. His grace that moves us to do the unheard of. Grace that draws us together, makes us of one heart and mind, looses selfishness from our clenched fists. It God’s grace that gives us a testimony of any kind. It is the God’s grace that we have a redeemed, resurrected and changed life. And it is because of God’s tremendous, unmerited grace toward us that we can bless anyone.

It’s all because of God. And that, friends, is earth-shaking.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 26, Day 9: Word of God Speak

2009-10-27T23:40:00.001-10:00

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All that I need is to be with You and in the quiet hear Your voice.

Word of God Speak
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

[CHORUS]
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

[sung by Big Daddy Weave]

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 25, Day 9: Counting my blessings

2009-10-26T00:57:00.001-10:00

On Day 9 of our annual 40-day church fast, a brief list of some of the things I’ve learned about blessing lately.

I’m blessed when I slow down to hear Jesus and appreciate others
Blessing doesn’t depend upon quantity or size
Blessing sometimes requires cracking open a hard, protective shell: mine
I can bless even when I’m grouchy; it just doesn’t look as pretty
Being able to forgive is a huge blessing
Asking for forgiveness blesses me even more than the person I’m asking forgiveness of
An authentic affirmation is the blessing that can make another person’s day
Blessing that involves creativity makes the reward all mine
Sometimes the best blessing I can give someone is to not say anything at all
Blessedness is being connected to God through the Holy Spirit
Blessing someone else is an act I do in conjunction with God and never apart from Him.
I feel blessed by even the smallest thank you
If I dig down with God, beneath the pain there’s always blessing just waiting to escape
The well of blessing Jesus draws from can never be emptied, never runs dry
God loves to bless his children. If we’re not receiving any, simply acting like adults

Pamela A. Chun
©October 25, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

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Blessing me as I listen

2009-10-24T21:09:00.001-10:00

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As the Deer
By Marty Nystrom (sung in this rendition by Salvador)

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after thee
You alone are my hearts desire
And I long to worship thee

Chorus
You alone are my strength my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my hearts desire
And I long to worship thee

You're my friend and You are my brother,
Even though you are a king.
I love you more thank any other,
So much more than anything.

I want You more than gold or silver,
Only You can satisfy.
You alone are the real joy Giver,
And the apple of my eye.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 24, Day 8: Listen to the blessing

2009-10-24T14:56:00.001-10:00

For me, personally, prayer becomes more and more a way to listen to the blessing. I have read and written much about prayer, but when I go to a quiet place to pray, I realize that the real “work” of prayer is to become silent and listen to the voice that says good thing is about me. This might sound self-indulgent, but, in practice, it is a hard discipline. I am so afraid of being cursed, of hearing that I am no good or not good enough, that I quickly give in to the temptation to start talking and to keep talking in order to control my fears.

- Henri Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World
http://www.amazon.com/Life-Beloved-Spiritual-Living-Secular/dp/0824519868/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1219782553&sr=8-1

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 23, Day 7: All you need is a table

2009-10-24T00:29:00.001-10:00

When God asks us to bless others, sometimes all we need is a table – a simple table to invite them to sit with us so we can share our lives. We don’t need a fancy spread, carefully written invitations, or even a lot of forethought. All we need to do is a tiny bit of time and space, enough to say, “I care. Come around my table with me for a few moments.” And then just listen. Love them. Laugh with them. Let them have a place at our table.

Pamela A. Chun
©October 21, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 22, Day 6: Blessed at the foot of the cross

2009-10-23T01:08:00.001-10:00

Today I listened to a sermon called “The Cross Shouldn’t Be Our Kryptonite” by a friend, Pastor Ken Fong of Evergreen Baptist Church Los Angeles [http://www.ebcla.org/]. I’m not exactly sure about the kryptonite metaphor but Ken’s message hit me hard about understanding the power and the blessing of admitting our need for the cross. It was a message that spoke to me about regularly, even daily, examining myself —not for sin so that God can condemn me, but for sin and shortcomings so that God can forgive and bless me.

The idea isn’t that we do this to become perfect, because no one is perfect. We do this because God is perfect and knows how to love and care for us perfectly in ways that don’t punish us, make us pay pack for our wrong doings, or belittle us. Instead, God says, “Let me bless you even though you are not perfect.”

Blessing comes because of our imperfection. I am blessed by the undeserved, unearned, unmerited grace of God. To receive it I need to live like I need the cross – acknowledging daily that I am not sufficient to answer all of life’s tough situations and that I certainly am not sufficient for saving others, myself, or the world.

If you would like to listen to Ken’s sermon, you can find it on iTunes at http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?i=61076624&id=129600028
(The beginning is a report to the congregation of its capital campaign. Ken begins speaking about 8:30 into the audio.)

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The best king of Israel has fallen the farthest. But neither he, nor anyone, can fall beyond the reach of God's love & forgiveness -P.Yancey

2009-10-22T09:25:00.001-10:00

Quote from Philip Yancey’s book Meet the Bible and my thought for the day.

http://www.zondervan.com/Cultures/en-US/Product/ProductDetail.htm?ProdID=com.zondervan.9780310243038&QuerySiteString=Zondervan&QueryStringSite=Zondervan

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 21, Day 5: When fair isn't fair

2009-10-21T22:20:00.001-10:00

A friend and I have been struggling over the issue of fairness.

We struggle over situations when things aren’t “fair,” especially in relationships. We understand the concept of pulling our own weight, of pitching in, of being and taking responsibility—and what gets us raw, impatient, grumpy, and sullen is when others don’t. We ask, “Why do we have to be the Responsible Adult all the time?” Why does it seem that when we ask for forgiveness, it isn’t reciprocated? We feel taken advantage of, taken for granted, asked to pitch in even more when we already feel we have given our fair share and probably even more into a situation. We often end up having to suck it up, while “they” luxuriate in their own little worlds.

Not fair, Lord, we complain—and we are tired. You know it would be so much easier if each person did their fair share; or better yet if every person went overboard in giving to a relationship. If each person contributed 60%, added up in a two-person relationship, we’re way over 100! But. But, Lord, they’re not doing 60%. Heck, it feels like their not even doing 50% and most of the time it’s a stretch to see they are putting in much more than 40%

Lord, if everything were done by everyone fairly, the world would be such a better place. And if every one did even just a little more than what was fairly required — say, 51% — everything would be swelling in abundance

But that’s not what happens. Life isn’t fair. Circumstances get thrust upon us. We are perceived as strong and confident: competent, and once again the scales are imbalanced. We do more because we can. And yet, that is what God calls us to do, and to do it freely, do it unfairly.

Here’s what author Philip Yancey says:

To understand this issue of human freedom, it may help to imagine a world in which everyone truly does get what he or she deserves. That world would be just and consistent, and everyone would clearly know what God expected. Fairness would reign. There is, however, one huge problem with such a tidy world: it's not at all what God wants to accomplish on earth. God wants from us love, freely given love, and we dare not underestimate the premium God places on that love. Freely given love is so important that God allows our planet to be a cancer of evil in the universe—for a time.

If this world ran according to fixed, perfectly fair rules, there would be no true freedom. We would act rightly because of our own immediate gain, and selfish motives would taint every act of goodness. In contrast, the Christian virtues described in the Bible develop when we choose God and God's ways in spite of temptation or impulses to do otherwise.

God wants us to choose to love freely, even when that choice involves pain, because we are committed to God, not to our own good feelings and rewards. God wants us to cleave, as Job did, even when we have every reason to deny God hotly. Job clung to God’s justice when he was the best example in history of God’s apparent injustice. He did not seek the Giver because of gifts; after all gifts were removed, he still sought the Giver.

[Where Is God When It Hurts pp 89-91]

Fairness obliviates freedom. Fairness forces people to do things out of fairness and not out of love. When fairness rules, we’ve no more God to run to for mercy, grace, blessing.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 20, Day 4: The cloak of blessing

2009-10-20T23:18:00.001-10:00

Yesterday’s post cited Paul’s Letter to the Romans, who to bless and how to bless, and specifically how to respond to evil (Romans 12:9-21). It’s very practical advice that ends with if your enemy is hungry, feed him, thirsty give him something to drink, overcome evil with good.

Practical advice that sounds easy enough. But is it easy? I don’t think so, especially since often the people whom we consider our enemies are those whom we feel have hurt us, harmed us, left us angry, sad, and cheated.

But it’s not only Paul who writes this. Jesus himself says:

38"You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth. 39But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. (Matthew 5:38-41)

We want to say to Jesus, “It’s not fair!” If we feel hurt, why should we have to turn the other cheek? If we’ve been cheated, why should we let them cheat us more? Why can’t we just leave them alone and let them leave us alone? They already have our tunic, why give away our cloak?

I was thinking a lot about this today because this morning, God told me how to go the extra mile with someone who stood on the other side of the fence from me, someone, to borrow Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:11, who had insult me, persecuted me and falsely said all kinds of evil against me.

Yesterday, God asked me to bless this person and then gave me an in-your-face opportunity to do that, which I did, and which blessed me. Today, God then asked me to bless that person again—this time not with a hard to ignore immediate situation, but instead showing me the opportunity then asking me to go out of my way to take the initiative. Yesterday, he put that person directly in my path and said, “Here, bless him.” Today, he said, “Here’s another opportunity that will make you go out of your way, that will require you to track him down yourself and bless him.”

But my cloak, Lord, my cloak! I protested, then gave it away anyway.

And then I discovered something. After I did it, I felt good, I felt fine. In fact, I felt better than fine, I felt filled. I discovered I didn’t need my cloak! I wasn’t cold. The thing that I had held onto so tightly for years to cover me, keep me warm, be my protection, hide under, give me dignity, show me self-worth, make me blend in with everyone else…wasn’t necessary. I didn’t need it anymore – once I gave it away.

The opportunity to bless our enemies often comes cloaked. We don’t recognize it for what it is. We think it will be hard and cost us too much, when in the end it doesn’t cost us a thing.

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Who is blessed?

2009-10-20T22:07:00.001-10:00

Matthew 5:1-12 (New International Version)

Matthew 5

The Beatitudes

1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach them saying:
3"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
      for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
      for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
      for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
      for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
      for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart,
      for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers,
      for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
      for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 19, Day 3: How to Bless, Who to Bless

2009-10-20T01:10:00.001-10:00

From Pauls’ Letter to the Romans 12:9-21 (New International Version)

9Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

14Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. 20On the contrary:
   "If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
      if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
   In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." 21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Via Bible Gateway http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%2012:9-21&version=NIV

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 18, Day 2: Unconditional Love

2009-10-19T00:04:00.001-10:00

A light bulb went on in my head today as I was listening to yet another Francis Chan podcast, “Motivating Through Grace” [ Download from iTunes here http://ax.itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=74283811]. In it, Francis speaks of how we can live through the stress and anxieties of life because of the grace of God – and he quotes the apostle Paul’s letter to the Galatians 6:9-10 about 0:40 in:

9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people……

This, I realized, was the essence of showing unconditional love to others — not loving them in spite of the condition of their heart, but loving them in spite of the condition of my heart. Unconditional love is about loving others even when I am weary, even when I am tired, even when I am grumpy, weak, wanting, spent: loving them even when I don’t feel like loving them.

I have forever thought of unconditional love only in terms of the condition of others. I have thought that it only meant that God loves me despite my condition and therefore I should love others despite theirs: despite how imperfect they are, never mindful of their being nasty and needy, selfish and silly, forgetful and frustrating, unreasonable and unwilling, judgmental and jealous, sick and supercilious, hurt, potentially harmful, crazy, nuts, misinformed, stubborn, unthoughtful, self-centered, spiteful, cynical, depressed, critical…hard to love.

That still holds true. However, that takes the higher position of assuming that I am doing them a favor by loving them in spite of themselves.

Today, I realized that unconditional love also means loving others in spite of myself. Paul says in essence, “Are you tired? Do good anyway.” I would elaborate on that to say: Am I feeling inconvenienced, not up to it, begrudging, taken advantage of, misunderstood, drained? Am I less than willing? Love anyway. Love without regard to the condition of my heart because that is true love, God’s type of love —love that loves even when I don’t find it easy.

It’s not up to me to point out the condition of other people’s hearts. That’s called judgment. But it is up to me to love when I don’t feel like it, without condition. That’s unconditional love, and that’s grace.

Prayer and contemplation:
Who am I stopping from giving love to because I feel like it? Have I put myself on a sabbatical from love because I feel burned out from loving too much, as if that were possible? Show me, Lord, how to love unconditionally, freely, without stopping to decide if I am ready or they are worthy. Holy Spirit, examine my heart and my intentions and free me to love despite myself.

Read the full passage and all of Paul’s letter to the Galatians here:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians+6&version=TNIV

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Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Day 1: Bless

2009-10-17T22:56:00.001-10:00

Slow Down And Show Grace by Francis Chan (16075 KB)
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Today is the first day of our church’s traditional fall fast. We spend 40 days incorporating a spiritual discipline into our lives that will help us grow in God and break the fast on Thanksgiving. Some people fast from specific foods, or refrain from habits; some go cold turkey on coffee, sweets, alcohol, television, sarcasm, or buying unnecessary items. Other incorporate a new practice into their lives: finding someone in need to help every day, exercise mixed with prayer, reading a devotional or spending more time with God.

It’s become my habit to ask God what he would suggest for my fast. And this time I felt he told me to focus on blessing. Learn about what it means to bless and practice it. Bless someone everyday: someone whom I struggle to love, someone whom I have overlooked or not given that much thought to, or on a given day someone I care about deeply and want to bless even more.

I started by listening to a message by our friend Francis Chan called “Slow Down and Show Grace.” Francis is pastor of Cornerstone Church in Simi Valley, CA, and he speaks frequently for my nonprofit ministry Hawaiian Islands Ministries. What I love about Francis is how authentic and transparent he is about where he is on the journey with Jesus. This message really spoke to me and was one of the catalysts that pointed me to make this a 40 Day Fast of Blessing. I hope you’ll take time to listen to it, too.

First 15 min is devoted to a guest speaker. Francis’ main message begins at 0:15 in to the podcast.
If you enjoyed Francis’ message, consider subscribing to the podcast. Both audio and video versions are available on iTunes.

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Humbled and grateful

2009-07-11T09:34:00.001-10:00

Gosh, I’m humbled but mystified that my March 4, 2009 post, Why I Need Forgiveness, has had more than 2300 hits, with 200 in just the last week. Thank you to whomever is passing my writing along. I’m glad you’re finding it helpful on your personal journey. And if you are passing it along, uh, can you tell me who you are so I can thank you?

Pam

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Notions

2009-07-11T09:18:00.001-10:00

There are pictures that can break my heart
And songs that make me weep
And stories of my fellow man
That bring me troubled sleep.
There are moments when my aching soul
Could wrench itself and flee
To search in new horizons
For some tranquility.
There are friend I know that give me pain
And make me relaize
A price paid for caring
That’s often sorely high. —Vas

[My yellowed newspaper clipping that my dad sent me when I was in college.]

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Scarred for Life

2009-07-05T23:18:00.001-10:00

I have a scar on my chin.

I got it when I fell down when I was 12 years old. It runs along the bottom of my chin where you can’t see it. It’s almost flat but I can feel it when I rub my fingers along it, a very slight hump right at my jaw. I don’t look to see if it’s there, but I can feel it, and that’s enough.

I got the scar while walking the dog—a bassett hound, one of those lazy looking dogs with long, draggy ears, hotdog body, short legs, sad eyes. The dog and I were coming home early evening from the park down the street, heading uphill to the house, hurrying to get to a Friday night high school football game.

The dog was on my right. We were running side-by-side straight up the sidewalk, having just crossed the street, the house maybe ten yards away—when out of nowhere a cat dashed across our path. The cat flew left, the dog followed likewise and ran in front of me. But I kept running straight ahead, tripping over the dog and leash and landing smack on my chin.

Pulling myself off the concrete in the dim evening light, I yanked the dog back and stumbled home. My dad met me in the driveway. He had just pulled his car into the garage and heard me walk up. Shook up, shocked, numb, my chin throbbing, I had no idea of how badly I was hurt until he asked what happened to me, took my head into his hands, turned my chin up, and stuck his thumb into a gaping, bloody gash.

He didn’t say much, only that he had to stitch me up. He acted quickly, without hesitation, grabbed something for the blood, and got me into his car. I don’t remember anything about the ride to the hospital, but we went straight to ER, where the nurses let my dad the orthopedic surgeon have an area to work, no questions asked. There, he cleaned the wound, filled a syringe with xylocaine, injected it into the cut with a long, sharp needle, and meticulously sewed up my chin. Then he took me to the football game.

I recall at the time being really mad at my sister (the dog was her dog, but she, being three years older and in high school, had been allowed to go ahead to the football game with her friends…while I walked the dog). I remember being mad at my mom for making we walk the dog, mad at the dog, mad at the cat, mad at the awkward bandage that encased my chin.

But I don’t think on those things anymore. The gash healed, a week later my dad took the sutures out, I stopped being angry at my sister, the dog got old and died. All that’s left is the scar, and now, years later, I realize I’m glad I have it.

The nature of scars
We all have scars – burn scars, surgical scars, disfigurements from sports injuries, motor vehicle accidents, battle scars. We also have scars from emotional wounds, injuries of the deepest kind that often go untended because no one can see them. How well the wounds heal, how well the scars form, depends on…us. It depends on whether we want to be healed, whether we allow others to help us, whether we put ourselves into the hands of a healer—or if we refuse to acknowledge we’re hurt or do things that aggravate the injury.

My dad was a healer. He had a gift for medicine and surgery. His surgical residents used to recount how precisely, neatly, and quickly he could pin a hip: good placement, firm hand, accurate strokes, clean close. Done.

But he was more than a good technician with skilled hands. He was a healer at heart who loved people and to whom God gave a spiritual gift of healing. I cannot count the number of times patients would take leave his office, tears of gratitude in their eyes, and stop and tell my sister and I at the front desk what a good man our father was. I’ve no idea what he said to them, not being privy to doctor-patient conversations, but seeing the relief on his patients’ faces told me he didn’t just set fractures and repair meniscus tears, but went beyond to touch something deeper than bone and sinew. As a trained physician, he was taught to observe and listen in order to heal; and as a healer with God’s eyes and ears he saw and heard more than physical pain.

Not just what we do but who we are
My dad helped show me that the gift of healing is not just what we do, but who we are. It’s easy to put a Band-Aid on a cut, or throw an icepack on a muscle, or tape a finger to a splint. The human body is made to heal, regenerate blood, grow new tissue. But what is not easy is taking the time to look beyond the obvious presented symptoms, to touch, to care, to listen to those who hurt for what really pains them, to see what lies beneath their eyes, and then to walk alongside and help them invite God The Healer to do the rest.

Healing is God’s territory. It’s what He wants to do, it’s what He does best. He does it because He loves us. He wants to pick us off the ground and mend the gaping holes, rout out the infection, reset our broken bones and restore our crushed spirit. He wants to help us move freely with strength, show us how to use muscles to their best capacity, run farther, jump higher, sprint faster, and breath His air.

The prophet Isaiah so magnificently writes:

      [28] Have you not known?
      Have you not heard?
      The everlasting God, the LORD,
      The Creator of the ends of the earth,
      Neither faints nor is weary.
      His understanding is unsearchable.
      [29] He gives power to the weak,
      And to those who have no might He increases strength.
      [30] Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
      And the young men shall utterly fall,
      [31] But those who wait on the LORD
      Shall renew their strength;
      They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
      They shall run and not be weary,
      They shall walk and not faint. [Isaiah 40:28-31, New King James version]

This is a picture of healing, a picture of wholeness that becomes our experience when we turn our heads to recognize the Creator God. And we who have experienced His healing and strength are often called, always called to be the connection points that show how much God desires to give this extraordinary healing to every person that He has created and loves.

That’s what I love about my scar.
My scar reminds me not that I was wounded but that I was healed. It is a tattoo of my father’s love, that although he passed away in 2006, shall forever remain a tangible remnant, an indelible mark of his healing touch and imprint on my life.

Scarred for life
It has also become a metaphor for me for what all scars should be – reminders of a healing and not a recollection of a hurt. I believe that God can and wants to do that for all of our hurts, the one’s bleeding and visible, and the ones buried and painfully immobilizing: He wants to see us walk in wholeness. He desires to change us with His healing. He wants to scar us for life with His love.

Pamela A. Chun
©July 5, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

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One sentence on Being a Christian

2009-06-13T12:27:00.001-10:00

Being a Christian for me means having a relationship with Jesus Christ in which his is the most important voice in my life.

This working definition is a personal statement that attempts to describe how I live my life as a Christian – a follower of Jesus Christ – devoid of jargon. This is a work in progress, just as I am.

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What delights me

2009-05-28T22:16:00.001-10:00

A friend asked me today what I like. That prompted me to think about what I not just “like,” but what delights me – gives me joy on the inside. I came up with this list:

I delight in sitting around a meal table with my husband and our kids and talking together.
I delight in a good cappuccino.
I delight in a beautiful day on San Francisco Bay: blue skies, bit of wind, Golden Gate Bridge visibility.
I delight in friends who share Jesus’ heart with me.
I delight in hearing God speak to me – whichever way he chooses to speak.
I delight in being used by God.
I delight in having my children’s friends over at the house.
I delight in crafting a well-written piece.
I delight in deep, meaningful conversation.
I delight in the love of my children.
I delight in a good, long swim in a full Olympic-size pool, water temp 72°F, without time constraints.
I delight in spring mornings, particularly in the Bay Area.
I delight in the sight and sound of Hawaii’s oceans and its cool tradewinds.
I delight in farmers markets and Chinatowns.
I delight in fragrant pikake and roses.
I delight in walks with my husband.

It’s kind of like a “Favorite Things” list – I may find myself adding more. Having any one of those things in a day would make me extremely happy. Today I got at least 7 of them.

The apostle Paul writes in Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

What things do you think on that bring you delight?

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Stewardship Buzz | Lent Blog Post

2009-03-08T02:05:00.002-10:00

Stewardship has long been a buzz word in the church.
We use the word stewardship to talk about how we appropriate our gifts, our resources – all that we have, from our money in the bank to the muscles in our back.

Wikipedia sums up the term and its history nicely:

Stewardship is personal responsibility for taking care of another person's property or financial affairs or in religious orders taking care of finances. Historically, stewardship was the responsibility given to household servants to bring food and drinks to a castle dining hall. The term was then expanded to indicate a household employee's responsibility for managing household or domestic affairs. Stewardship later became the responsibility for taking care of passengers' domestic needs on a ship, train and airplane, or managing the service provided to diners in a restaurant. The term continues to be used in these specific ways, but it is also used in a more general way to refer to a responsibility to take care of something one does not own. "Every person has a responsibility to look after the planet both for themselves and for the future generations. Acting irresponsibly could cause damage such as pollution, the destruction of cultural herritage, etc." [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stewardship]

The concept behind stewardship puts us basically in the role of manager and not proprietor.

For me, it’s honestly a psychological ploy or maybe even sly euphemism to get us to let go of what we’ve got. In other words, if we are stewards, we have the “privilege” of serving it up, opening the gates, regulating the flow, deciding the course with everything in an outward direction.

Jesus drove in points about stewardship in his teachings. In the Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-28 he addresses how a wise steward ought to invest the master’s wealth with intent of increasing the principle. The man given five talents of money doubles his money, as does the man given two talents – and the master commends them for this. But the man with one talent buries it in the ground, and receives no appreciation on the money, nor any from his master.

Interestingly, quite the opposite in the Parable of the Shrewd Manager [Luke 16:1-15], Jesus offers up the story of a manager accused of poor stewardship but whom the master in the end commends even though it yields a net financial loss. The short story is that on the eve of potentially losing his job, the manager strips a debt of 800 gallons of olive oil owed the master to 400. He reduces another man’s 1000 bushels of wheat owed to 800. Jesus makes his teaching point this:

The master commended the dishonest manager because he had acted shrewdly. For the people of this world are more shrewd in dealing with their own kind than are the people of the light. I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.

With these and other Biblical passages as backdrop, my language for talking about money has always used the “S” word – Stewardship. And the questions revolving around money and resource issues, challenges…okay, procurement, have prodded conversations about use and management philosophies.

However, I’ve got another problem.
I’ll say it blankly. My struggles with Stewardship—how much, to whom, when, how—are really not so much Stewardship issues but Ownership issues.

I struggle not because I am a Steward, but because deep down inside I believe I’m the OWNER.
Sure, I say all that I have is yours, Lord—but I say it with an attitude of it’s still mine and I’m giving it back to you. Maybe it was yours in the beginning, but I took ownership of it and, honestly, I kind of liked it, and now in good conscious because I know it’s the proper thing to do, I am giving it back to you. Some of it. The part I don’t need. The portion that makes me feel good when I generously give. But not all of it. Only what I can afford to give away, but I’m saving the rest for Me.

I am giving. I have control. I have will. I have choice. I have responsibility. I am making the decision. Someday if I’ve done a good job, I’ll be commended for it. I, I, I.

Why am I so possessive? Why do I want to exact so much control? Is it a lack of trust? Or perhaps my relationship with God isn't what I thought. And maybe I don’t understand my need and my fears.

Maybe I just need to stop thinking of myself as owner.
What would happen if I signed away all my possessions to God? Everything, the small stuff as well as the big: My car, my clothes, the laundry detergent I use to wash my clothes. The hours in my day, my quiet time with God. My skills and education, my work experience. The food I eat, the parties I attend, the music I listen to. The Internet. The tea I bought in China last year, the pants that I say God bought for me. My diamond engagement ring, the heirloom jade passed down to me from my grandmother. The roads and highways, the traffic signal, everything city, county, state, and federal. My creative work, my words, this writing.

And if not owner, what? A tenant, renter, user, borrower? A leech? Or how about a different view altogether

Am I afraid of poverty?
Tonight we had dinner with Rafonzel Fazon, a young woman, 21 years old who came from the poorest of the poor areas in the Philippines. She became a Compassion International sponsored child when she was five, supported, fed, educated, encouraged by a sponsor in the U.S. whom she has never met. She is now working towards her bachelor’s degree in communications and in a special program that pays for her college tuition while continuing to nurture her as a disciple of Jesus Christ.

She said that when she was little she used to be so hungry and would worry every day what she might get to eat. Every day she worried about a meal. But through the Compassion program that works to “release children from poverty in Jesus’ name,” she worries no more.

She says this: Poverty is the fear that you will not have enough. But because I know that Jesus is taking care of all my needs, I do not fear anymore. That, she says is being released from poverty.

I need to reconsider my perspective.
Do I fear that I will not have enough? Do I fear that God will not have enough for me, so I stash some on the side?

In Jesus’ parables mentioned above, the first one talks about multiplication. It demonstrates an investment of resources that yields way more than the principle: two- and five-fold. That’s a pretty high return, and because of that master invites the servants to "share in his happiness." The second one speaks of divestment that wins friends and a place in eternity. In both parables, the stewards use their masters’ money, and in both, except for the servant who makes neither money nor friends, they are rewarded handsomely.

The point? It’s not mine to have, not mine to own and if I try to own things, they will own me. A purchase does not make it mine, only mine to use and pass on.

Jesus says in Mark 8:35-36: For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?

+ + +
LORD, help me to not make a claim on my own life. Help me to not look for ownership papers that make things “mine.” Help me to see your generosity and your genius and to trust in you. Remake me yet again in your Holy Spirit, and release me from the poverty of fear. In Jesus’ name.

Why I Need Forgiveness | March 4, 2009 blog post

2009-03-04T23:17:00.001-10:00

Let’s put the emphasis right here and now on need—as opposed to ought to consider, or may come in handy, or try it you’ll like it. The statement at hand is Why I Need Forgiveness, and every word counts.

Growing up Catholic, and if I may say a pretty good little Catholic girl, the Forgiveness lesson/principle wasn’t clear to me. No one quite explained it to me. Maybe I wasn’t bad enough; or maybe I didn’t want to be good enough, or maybe the adults around me felt too guilty themselves.

Or maybe Confession just took care of all that, thank you very much.

I remember having to go to Confession at least once a year because that’s what you did. We waited outside the triple chamber confession booth for our turns, the middle chamber occupied by the priest and the two flanking ones for us hardened sinners. A little red light above the door lintel of the priest’s chamber served as a high tech signal for “The Priest Is In.”

We fidgeted in the hard wooden pews amid the solemn cold of the church hearing only whispers and shuffles and the occasional cough-cough-cough. Then someone would escape a confessional box, and my sisters and I would negotiate “You go, no you go! Once inside, we’d kneel in the dark, unlit interior, and suddenly the small grate to the priest’s side would slide open so you knew: okay, let’s hear it, spill your guts.

I didn’t like going to Confession. I really didn’t know what to say: I was mean to my sister? I didn’t have any grave errors or omissions to report. Hadn’t stolen or killed anyone lately. What were those 10 Commandments anyway? I was a pretty good kid, but I had to give up something. The whole reason I was there was to ‘fess up. So I’d mumble something, and the priest would assign me 1 Act of Contrition, 3 Hail Mary’s and a Glory Be. He probably thought I was “cute.” No, I was scared.

My parents stopped making us go to Confession when we got to be older. It was enough that we made it to Mass in time. But Jesus hung on the cross behind every Catholic altar; he was kind of hard to miss. And I still felt compelled with the raising of the Eucharist and Cup at Communion to pound my chest with my fist three times reciting, “My Lord and my God. My Lord and my God. My Lord and my God.”

The question never left: What do I need forgiveness for?

As a young adult, my born-again Protestant friend confronted me about what I believed about God, Jesus, and why Jesus had to die—for me. The light went on for the first time. Jesus died so that I who am wholly human can have a relationship with God who is holy divine. The terrestial could mix with the heavenly; sin would not prevent me from approaching the sacred. What was in me that hurt others, hurt myself, hurt God—things I thought, did, felt, said would not permanently mar, but would be erased, forgiven. My years in cold, hard pews now made sense.

Forgiveness as a Survival Skill
However, in recent days, forgiveness has taken on a different depth, understanding, and even urgency. I am discoveringi that beyond the theoretical, philosophical, theological, I need to practice forgiveness so I can continue to live in this world.

Relationships fail us. People fail us. And that’s why I need forgiveness. It’s not a question of if something will go wrong, but when. We are just not perfect enough to prevent that from happening, intentionally or not.

I may not be the chief sinner. On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the most despicable, I-dare-you-to-forgive sin that includes murder, rape, genocide, torture, I sit pretty low. Not much has changed for this little Catholic girl.

And yet, if I do not, cannot forgive those whom I feel fail, betray, dishonor, ignore, hurt me, I will slowly shrink away. I will withdraw from relationships, refuse to interact, not have the strength to give relationships another try because I know failure is just around the corner. I will in short turn cold, allow my heart to harden, become less human.

I can only live amid the imperfectedness of this life through forgiveness.

In an email to my husband the other day as part of their ongoing dialogue about matters of faith, one of our daughter's friend quoted his Northwestern University professor Susanne Sklar as writing this:

If the Religion of Jesus is "Forgiveness of Sin" as [18th Century writer, poet, painter William] Blake says it is— then what might be called "imperfection" is part of the art form. We all sculpt space and time to create a world in which forgiveness is the animating or structuring principle. Space and time are ingredients with which we CREATE.

Creation is dynamic—it's beautiful and it may be fallible. But that's all right. Because the highest art form is forgiveness. That creates a space for more love. And love is not merely an emotion.

Nail on the head, or maybe quite vividly—to the cross. Jesus’ whole life spoke, demonstrated, practiced, and taught forgiveness. It’s what he lived by and what he died for. Even as he was dying, Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." [Luke 23:34]

Did Jesus say this only because the people who crucified him had done wrong? Was it only because they needed forgiveness? Or perhaps is it what I’m discovering: that unforgiveness creates havoc in me. I need to forgive for my sake, not others’. I simply cannot exist, let alone co-exist with others if I am carrying away the crushing weight of hurt. And as Susanne Sklar says, when I do forgive, I create space—space for more love, and love validates my existence. As Paul the apostle wrote, “If I…have not love, I am nothing.” [1 Cor 13:2]

Creating space for love.
It’s hard to forgive. I’ve spent a lifetime learning how to do it, learning that I must do it, learning that it takes time and process to do it. It can be pretty painful. But it’s far worse to not forgive. However, Jesus can take away the pain when we give over to him the wrongs and injustices. He will carry it away, and in its place, he will create a space for love.

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Waking March 2, 2009

2009-03-03T00:45:00.001-10:00

I really like this description of coming to a life with Jesus by N.T. Wright in his book Simply Christian [http://books.google.com/books?id=7fanGwAACAAJ&dq=NT+Wright&source=an&hl=en&ei=2_-sSZPPEpmMsQOs9sTOBA&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=6&ct=result]. He writes on pp 204-205:

What happens when you wake up in the morning?

            For some people, waking up is a rude and shocking experience. Off goes the alarm, and they jump in fright, dragged out of a deep sleep to face the cold, cruel light of day.

            For others, it’s a quiet, slow process. They can be half-asleep and half-awake, not even sure which is which, until gradually, eventually, without any shock or resentment, they are happy to know that another day has begun.

            Most of us know something of both, and a lot in between.

            Waking up offers one of the most basic pictures of what can happen when God take s a hand in someone’s life.

            There are classic, alarm-clock stories. Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus, blinded by a sudden light, stunned an speechless, discovered that the God he had worshipped had revealed himself in the crucified and risen Jesus of Nazareth. John Wesley found his heart becoming strangely warm, and he never looked back. They and a few others are the famous ones, but there are millions more.

            And there are many stories, though they don’t hit the headlines in the same way, of the half-awake and half-asleep variety. Some people take months, years, maybe even decades, during which they aren’t sure whether they’re on the outside of Christian faith looking in, or on the inside looking around to see if it’s real.

            As with ordinary waking up, there are many people who are somewhere in between. But the point is that there’s such a thing as being asleep, and there’s such a thing as being awake. And it’s important to tell the difference, and to be sure you’re awake by the time you have to be up and ready for action, whatever that action may be.

           I love N.T. Wright’s recognition that everyone’s experience of having God abide in their lives is not prescriptive but full of variety. It’s also personal.

            I look at my life as a gradual, continual waking-up. When I first woke up to the desire of wanting Jesus to be a part of my life for the rest of my life 30 years ago, in one very real sense, everything suddenly became more real than ever. I saw more, heard more, felt more. And not a day goes by that my senses are not sharpened even more and my mind awakened even more.

            At the same time, that experience was part of a process, a longer experience of being exposed and introduced to God as far back as I could remember. Never was God was an impossibility, a myth or lie.

            The thing, as N.T. Wright points out, is that when I woke up as college-age adult, I could tell the difference. I had crossed a line, switched into a new dimension of consciousness and reality within a world I thought I already knew.

            The current global economic crisis calls for similar: a wake up to a new reality. May it even be a spiritual one.

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More Thoughts on Powerlessness February 28, 2009

2009-03-01T01:56:00.001-10:00

Feelings of powerlessness come when we feel empty, when we feel the life has been sucked out of us, when we feel completely unable to effect change, when we feel spent and that no one values our life.

This is how Elijah the prophet felt. After confronting, defeating, and killing the false prophets of Baal in 1 Kings 18. We read in 1 Kings 19.3-5:

Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day's journey into the desert. He came to a broom tree, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. "I have had enough, LORD," he said. "Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors." Then he lay down under the tree and fell asleep.

We all have deserts we run to, some place we hide, far away where no one can find us. It can be a physical place, it can be a state of mind, it can be in the stupor of alcohol or durgs. It can even be among people where we put on a façade under whose thick layers the real us lies.

We know we have reached the place of utter loss when we hear ourselves saying, “I don’t care. I have no strength to care.” As Elijah said, “I have had enough, take my life,” and then lies down lifeless.

The story of Elijah offers such a good example to people whose buckets have drained out. With no power left, having spent it all, Elijah feels like an empty, shriveled vessel. The spirit that drove him lies as flat and listless as worn, uninflated balloon.

How does one recover except by waiting, resting, and keeping our windows cracked for the light, gentle touch of God.

Read all of 1 Kings 19 carefully. After Elijah lies down, God sends an angel to awaken him, touching him, and then just feeding him. It’s just food, not a command or vision or expectation, but a little fresh cake and water. After that, Elijah lies down and goes back to sleep.

He reminds me of my sons who become listless and unresponsive when sick. And that’s it: Elijah is soul and spirit sick. He had stood up to 850 false prophets in a spectacular match in which fire came down from the heavens to consume an impossible wet mound of sacrificial offering, and then he had them, in the words of the Bible, “slaughtered.” The episode ends with Jezebel sending death threats to him. How could he not feel sick to his stomach?

Like a loving parent, God knows his servant has nothing left, and He loves Elijah nonetheless. Can we remember that? That God loves us because He just does—and not for what we can do or have done for him? The Lord looks lovingly on us and does not push us on. Sometimes he just lets us rest without saying a word.

After letting Elijah rest, God feeds him again, this time saying, “Get up and eat for the journey is too much for you.” God sends Elijah on a journey and he provides the strength to do it.

God provides the means for the way…the way to Him because Elijah’s journey takes him to Mount Horeb, “the mountain of God” (1 Kings 19:8), the place where Moses received from the Ten Commandments from God. Here, Elijah also encounters God, but it is a curious interaction.

God asks Elijah, “What are you doing here?” He asks Elijah this twice, and I don’t think God poses this as either rhetorical or redundant but truly one that He wants Elisha to answer. And here’s where I find it curious. Elijah answers the question, “What are you doing here” with what he has done, and he gives the same answer both times:
He replied, "I have been very zealous for the LORD God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too." 1Kings 19:10 and 14.
I believe Elijah answers in this way the first time because he simply doesn’t know why he is there – so he tells God about what he has done, the condition of his life, and the loneliness of his existence. “I am the only one left.”

God’s answer is amazing. He answers by showing Elijah his presence – but God’s presence does not look like what Elijah thinks. He is not in powerful winds, earthquakes or fires. God is not in things that look destructive and are overpowering. Instead, God is in a gentle whisper.

And isn’t that what we all want to hear, a gentle whisper? We want a voice that penetrates our heart and touches the intimate parts of our soul and says, “I hear you, I understand you, I love you. My power does not overpower and destroy you or suck the life out of you. My power, my presence is a voice that validates your existence.”

What happens when God asks the question again, “What are you doing here?” is that Elijah answers exactly the same as before – this time not because he doesn’t know what to say but because he understands that he has been called to a cause that God will empower. And because of that, Elijah in the end can undertake God’s mission to go to the Desert of Damascus and anoint a king for him as well as Elijah’s successor, Elisha.

The answer to powerlessness is perhaps not to seek to be refilled with what we were emptied of, but to continually discover where and what true power is. What I am learning is that true power gives life by saying in a gentle whisper, “You count.”

We rob people and make them powerlessness when we say or indicate to them that they do not count.

Can we make our challenge this Lent to listen for God’s whisper, and hearing him can we whisper into the hearts of others?

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

Thoughts on Powerlessness, February 27, 2009

2009-02-28T01:40:00.001-10:00

Even long-time followers of Jesus experience down turns, depression, deflated spirits. We don’t talk openly about it because we live in a church culture where we erroneously believe that we should always possess and exhibit a “more than conquerors” attitude.

But it’s not true.

If you ask even the most mature of believers, if you ask a church leader, a pastor, or anyone whose commitment to following Jesus extends 20, 30, 40 years – if you ask them if they have ever felt despair, wanted to throw in the towel, and on the edge of giving up hope, their honest answer will likely be an admitted yes.

Life is hard, and sometimes it grinds us to the bone to the point where we don’t want to get up. We feel that we have gotten up too many times, and this time we’re just too tired to make an effort – and even if we did, would anyone notice or care.

“Heresy, lies, lack of faith” you may cry out. “Pray more, spend more time reading and studying scripture – could it be that you have unconfessed sin that is rearing its nasty head?”

Oftentimes, most times, praying. Immersing yourself in the Word of God, and seeking godly counsel from others does work and lift us back to a level of feeling invincible.

However, it doesn’t happen all the time, and for this purpose:

God wants us to experience powerlessness.

He does it for several reasons:
1.    He wants to help us identify with the powerless of the world—the people without resources, access, advocates—people who see no hope and, therefore, can project no future—so that we will have greater compassion for them.

Look at the people whom Jesus lifted up: the lame, blind, disease, possessed, suppressed and oppressed. Jesus went those whom others ostracized and told them, “You have value to me, and I love you so much that I am going to take away your shame.” He did this for blind Bartimaeus, the woman at the well, the woman accused of adultery, people whom others not only pushed way outside of their circle, but pushed down again and again.

2.    He wants to cut our ties to false power, to things that cannot fill or last so that we can receive more of His Power.

God does not want our lives charged by an inferior power—only by His power that created the world and created us. It’s the bottom rung of the 12 Step Program of Alcoholics Anonymous where we feel powerless to change ourselves. Up until then we have been trying to change ourselves through wrong measures, and instead of being empowered we get fried.
Before Jesus ascended into heaven, he told his disciples, “I am going to send you what my Father has promised; but stay in the city until you have been clothed with power from on high." (Luke 24:49)

3.    He wants us to serve and love others.

Serving one another has less to do with doing, and more to do with caring.

Time for bed right now. More thoughts tomorrow.

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

Thursday, February 26, 2009

2009-02-27T00:29:00.001-10:00

Lent begins again. With Lent, I feel compelled to once again take a spiritual journey with words and blog.

So, if you followed me on the last 40 day fast in the fall…I’m Backkkk! And I’m warning you ahead of time that this ride may feel different. This isn’t Disneyland. This is Life.

[Prayer]
Lord, help me to listen with everything I’ve got—not just to hear you, but to hear others. Because when I hear others and what they’re really saying beyond the fragile, futile words, I validate them. They become real and not just passersby or extras in the film of life.

Give me ears that can bear to hear what they are truly saying. When I listen that way, I begin to hear what you hear. That’s a lot of noise.

When my ears are opened, however, maybe my eyes will be opened, too.

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

Growth Stinks

2009-01-26T00:52:00.001-10:00

Growth Stinks

“What is that smell?” What I could only liken to the reek of rotting fish passed through the kitchen. It made its mark again when I opened the closet and send me rummaging through the canned goods I was prepared to find the worst.

Nothing. No bad tins, leaking bottles, molding dry good. I sniffed at the shiny, new cans of wild salmon bought earlier that day – a possible culprit among them? I turned over the solid white albacore, the organic whole tomatoes, and funky Chinese dried foods. Good news, bad news: nothing rotting, no oozing putrid guck. Still the smell.

The unconscionable stink came and went throughout the evening, me taking intermittent inhalations into the kitchen trash can, fruitless each time. I considered the neighbors, who at this time of year would be firing up their wood-burning cooker for annual Chinese New Year glutinous rice cakes (gow). I blamed it on the trash that this week now piled up for once-only pickups instead of the former, better twice-weekly sanitation collection. And I thought of the New York nuns who recently filed suit against their upstairs Asian condo neighbors for “vomit-like smells” coming from their flat.

Yechhhh! The breeze blew in once more through the kitchen windows and I was overcome with the stench. “It smells like manure!” I commented to my son. That’s when he said, “Oh yeah, Dad put fertilizer on the plants.”

Manure
Stinky stuff, excrement, manure is the stuff that helps plants grow, and like it or not it’s what helps people grow too. As Romans 8:28 reminds us, “in all things God works for the good of those who love him.” ALL things—the waste, the fall-out, the leftovers, the offal and dung. God is the master recycler who sees to it that nothing is for naught and everything can be used to grow His kingdom in our hearts.

One of the sayings I’ve adopted the last couple years is: People learn at others’ expense. Their mistakes happen to us, affect us, create havoc for us. Nothing happens in a vacuum, especially life, which means that, yes, bad things happen to good people. Or as the saying goes, sh*t happens.

So what? With God’s help and perspective, take the crap and use it for fertilizer. Do the unthinkable—embrace it and say, ”Growth stinks.” Don’t let the others’ waste, waste you. [Point of reference: scene in Slumdog Millionaire.]

If we want to become better, wiser, stronger, gentler, more peaceful, better balanced, compassionate, insightful, better humored, loved and loving people—get used to the stinky smells, willingly walk through the manure, and even for a time live in it.

That doesn’t mean succumbing to it or becoming like it, but benefiting from it. If we can learn to take the nutrients that get cooked up in the chemical cocktail that is excrement, we will be better for it. We will grow, we will stand taller, firmer, deeper and stretch out our arms to provide shade and counsel to others.

Stink takes courage
You gotta hold your nose sometimes. We all find ourselves in situations where conditions are unbearable, where things have gotten so bad that they have begun to rot. However, even in the worst of times, maybe especially at the bottom of the mulching pit, when we turn to God and give it over to Him, he will show us how to use it for good, for growth.

The apostle Paul writes about this in 2 Corinthians 2:14-16, saying:
Thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life.

God’s work, Christ’s central, defining act, was to bring life from death. He overpowers the stink of decay with “knowledge of him” and triumphantly transforms fallen seed into fragrant blossoms that bear fruit.

Courage is not just having a stiff upper lip.
Do not be mistakened: Courage is not about strength or will, it is about heart. The root of the word courage comes from the Latin word cor meaning heart. Courage rises from the heart—and for believers from a heart nestled with Jesus who wants us to do the good that gives the heart peace and does not divide it.

Courage does mean doing the hard thing, and at times taking the path of most resistance but the one that finally breaks through the barriers that keep us small, root-bound, less than what we are meant to be.

What are we smelling?
Is it rotting fish or fertilizer? An augur of death or the prelude to growth? Do we sniff demise? Or like farmers who constantly turn over the earth in the business of growth do we quiver with the pungent possibility of beginning again in fertile soil?

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Christmas

2009-01-03T15:44:00.001-10:00

Always winter and never Christmas. Those are the conditions in the land of Narnia in the opening chapters of C. S. Lewis’s The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Narnia lies under the spell of the White Witch who keeps Narnia under a blanket of snow and perpetual winter.

I never understood what that meant until this Christmas. Maybe never having lived in snow I can’t conceive the cold to the marrow effects of forever frost. Perhaps knowing that the story would have a good ending, I pre-anticipated that Christmas would come and discounted Narnia’s winter as a temporary condition. Perhaps in my many, always recurring, never failing annual experiences of Christmas, I could never fathom a world without Christmas.

This Christmas, however, was different. I found myself living in a metaphorical Narnia where I longed for Christmas but somehow wasn’t so sure it would come.

Sure, there were ample signs of its coming: sparkling lights, festive trees, wreath, cards, carols, nativity scenes, and ample reminders of how many shopping days until Christmas. But I was not looking for the day, December 25th, which would inescapably come with the turn of a calendar page. I was looking for The Coming, Jesus’s coming

It wasn’t the feast of Christmas I needed, but the feel of Christ. Not the fact of Christmas, but the face of Christ. Not the pageantry of camels and magi, stars and stable, shepherds, flocks, frankincense, gold, and myrrh—but the power of God intersecting, interjecting, interrupting and restarting the world with the life of Jesus Christ.

No calendar, merchant, newspaper, government official or even religious leader could make that happen.

In the spirit of giving, we have made Christmas more about others and less about Christ. Even as Christians, we fall prey to commandeering Christmas into a show for the world, a proclamation of “our” truth, and an extravagant witness to the fact of Jesus. We politicize and, dare I say, betray the Christ Child, portraying him less the prophet and more a puppet manipulated by clumsy, willful, self-interested human hands.

With the best intentions, followers of Jesus talk about putting Christ back into Christmas. But it’s not as easy or simple as laying Baby Jesus in the manger of a nativity scene. That’s not our job, just as it wasn’t our job to bring Jesus into the world the first time.

We are powerless when it comes to Christmas. Our pocketbook and those who want a piece of it would make us believe different. However, we cannot make Christmas; only God can. It was His from the beginning. We can decorate around it, name it a holy holiday, add a artificial lights, and pile on traditions and expectations—but we cannot bring Christ into the world, not others’ worlds or even our own. We can only invite him in and wait—wait for God to birth him in our lives and transform the barren cold of winter into Christmas.

That’s what I waited for this year. I tried to do so without expectation so that God would have His way and not me, mine. And Christ came at God’s appointed time, not just at the ringing of a bell or human passing of time. He turned on the lights once more, reentering my world with new life amid infinite hallelujahs of angels and in glory.

Come Thou Long Expected Jesus
Come thou long-expected Jesus,
Born to set Thy people free;
From our fears and sins release us,
Let us find our rest in Thee.
Israel's strength and consolation,
Hope of all the earth Thou art;
Dear Desire of every nation,
Joy of every longing heart.

Born Thy people to deliver,
Born a Child and yet a King.
Born to reign in us for ever,
Now Thy gracious kingdom bring.

By Thine own eternal Spirit
Rule in all our hearts alone;
By Thine all-sufficient merit
Raise us to Thy glorious throne.

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

Loud & Clear

2008-12-14T01:00:00.001-10:00

Merry Christmas!

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Christmas Catharsis

2008-12-13T23:36:00.001-10:00

Bah Humbug! It’s the season to fight off my Scroogeness. I’m ‘fessing up. Do I see any other hands?

In the days before Christmas I constantly battle the bah-humbugs! Every year I feel pressured by expectations that are not Christmas. I revolt against traditions for the sake of tradition. Is Christmas supposed to stress me out? How real am I really if I have to forcibly maintain the merry and cheery when I am feeling weary and leery?

The clincher is no one wants to be accused of being Scrooge
I battle the sorry stereotype that anyone who lodges a complaint, whimpers a worry, just doesn’t feel up to it, not now, not this year, not that, has been seriously scrooged.

I fear that if I don’t show appropriate fa-la-la-la-la someone will say, “What happened to your Christmas Spirit?” I’ll be scorned and branded. Brainwashed by songs like It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year, Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, Have a Holly Jolly Christmas, Winter Wonderland, Jingle Bell Rock, and It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas, I feel knuckled every time I’m not having a holly, jolly holiday rocking through a winter wonderland.

Am I a frugal, stingy, no-joy, kill Santa who ought to be tied to an armchair to watch The Muppets’ Christmas Carol? (Not a bad idea–love that move.) I’m not against gifts, Christmas trees, lights, wreaths, parties, or even fruitcakes. I like waking up Christmas morning with half-dressed family members to unwrap presents around the tree. I just don’t like feeling forced to do Christmas as dictated by someone else.

Sometimes I get the feeling that someone stole Christmas and it’s not the Grinch.
Or maybe, I let it slip through my fingers. Perhaps I let it go. In the spirit of “love and joy come to you and to you a wassail too,” I have complied with the laws of tolerance, political correctness, and what’s true for me doesn’t have to be true for you. Let’s not offend anyone. I call it Christmas, you call it Hanukah, they call it Kwanzaa. Hey, peace on earth, let’s all call it “the holiday season.”

Can we just call the whole thing off? Bah humbug, Mr. Scrooge!
Or let’s just make sure that everyone has their choice of prophets and get on with it:

Door Number 1: Allah
Door Number 2: Buddha
Door Number 3: Joseph Smith
Door Number 4: L. Ron Hubbard
Door Number 5: Whomever Oprah’s following this week
Door Number 6: Satan
Door Number 7: Jesus
Door Number 8: Nobody because Nobody’s there

But that’s not Christmas
We should practice religious tolerance—literally tolerate others’ different religious beliefs. You can’t make people believe anything anyway: we all have to choose. But Christmas. Christmas is different.

Jesus IS the reason for the season, and Christ is in Christmas, and maybe the discomfort I feel, the frustration and my Scroogness is my fault. I have succumbed. I have surrendered. I have laid down my holy reverence for what Christmas really is and have let the holiday train steamroll me back and forth jingling it’s ho-ho-ho bells until I am as poor and crippled as Tiny Tim.

Christmas revolution
I’m not calling for a revolution of anywhere except my heart and my actions. I have to take back Christmas – not for others, not for the world, not for Jesus. But for myself.

Why? Because I do know the reason for the season. I know the story in history. And I know my story about why I honor the baby born in tiny Bethlehem to a virgin girl engaged to a clueless but faithful man. I know that hardly anyone knew the first Christmas was worth celebrating —some uneducated shepherds, some astrologists from out of town, some angels who descended from on high. No one hung wreaths, or made eggnog, or decorated cookies, or created any holiday sales.

And I know that I celebrate Christmas because Jesus Christ’s coming signified the end of the end and the beginning of the beginning. Jesus changed everything forever. He did what only the Son of God could do—collapse the unfathomable Creator of the limitless Universe, all his power, all his being, all his extraordinariness into a man who came to live among us with the sole purpose of telling us how much he loves us.

I have to do Christmas in ways that don’t pay someone to keep the holiday spirit but replay the original story of Jesus coming into the world—and how that has made all the difference in my world.

I need to change my playlist from Merry Christmas to Mary Had a Baby. From It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas to It Came Upon a Midnight Clear. And I have to let Christmas carols ring in my ears:

Hark the herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled"
Joyful, all ye nations rise
Join the triumph of the skies
With the angelic host proclaim:
"Christ is born in Bethlehem"
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Christ by highest heav'n adored
Christ the everlasting Lord!
Late in time behold Him come
Offspring of a Virgin's womb
Veiled in flesh the Godhead see
Hail the incarnate Deity
Pleased as man with man to dwell
Jesus, our Emmanuel
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!
Hail the Son of Righteousness!
Light and life to all He brings
Ris'n with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by
Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth
Born to give them second birth
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

I have to not think about Scrooge.
Scrooge was a fictional character. I am haunted by the Scrooges of Christmas past, present, and future, and I need to close the book on him, pull the plug, let him take a backseat to the main character in the one and only Christmas story – Jesus's birth.

And I have talk about Jesus
It’s my choice to talk to people about Christmas and not about “the holiday season.” It’s okay to see retail stores’ decorations for what they are—bait for bringing in the bucks. It’s my prerogative to seek to enjoy Christmas for what it is, and not for what it isn’t. It should be my joy to rightfully make Christmas the opportunity to share about my Savior—and not apologize for it.

So, bah-humbug, Mr. Scrooge. You’ve been scrubbed.

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Who Turned the Lights On?

2008-12-13T16:08:00.001-10:00

Bad weather today.

We’re having the first winter storm. Heavy sheets of rain drench everything, pouring off roofs, spewing out of gutters, turning yards into lakes. Wild sluices rampage down the mountainsides, drowning valley streams, issuing flash floods. In the high water streets, cars move like boats piloted by novice captains. Rogue gusts push people around, deform umbrellas, and deface clothes. Outside is one big soggy mess. Thankfully, inside it’s dry, calm, safe.

However, every once in a while, the lights flicker and sometimes we lose power completely for a few seconds. During the day, recovery amounts to the simple but irritating task of resetting every blinking digital clock—bed stand clock radio, TV, stovetop, microwave.

But night is a different story. In the few moments of utter darkness my slow processing mind goes from “Who turned off the lights” to “I think we’re having a power outage” to “Omigod, I can’t see!” Neurotic people like my husband station flashlights in every room of our house for just that reason. Non-neurotic (stupidly stubborn) people like me grope blindly in the dark trying to remember if the strategically placed flashlight was there or there—and then yell for help.

Few of us in this day and age experience pitch black. We have become accustomed to having light at all times of day. A flick of the switch, or even a flip of a cell phone, and we feel like God on the first day of Creation (And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. Genesis 1:3)

Used to be that when the sun went down, people stayed in. Now the setting sun is met by the twinkling start up of city lights. Cities change persona after dark. The dirt so obvious in broad daylight blends into the shadows while high above, skyscrapers dress the skyline like women in sequined gowns. Ablaze in electrifying trim, they become titillating, tantalizing, glamorous, glittering, gaudy spectacles in the night sky. New York’s Times Square, Tokyo’s Ginza, The Bund in Shanghai and Hong Kong Harbor, Paris, Rio de Janeiro, and the Queen herself, Las Vegas call out, “Look at me!” and defy the darkness.

But what happens when the lights go out? What if all the lights went out? What if they didn’t come back on for a very long time? And what if the thank-God-you’re-neurotic-I-love-you-because-you’re-crazy neurotic’s flashlights began to fail us?

Well, that’s kind of what happened in the 400 years between the end of the Old Testament prophets’ writings and the coming of Jesus Christ – an era known as “the intertestamental period.”

There were no electric lights to go out, but the Word of God, the voice of God through his prophets that had illuminated people’s lives, guided them, offered hope in shadowy situations, that had said there is still a way, my way, when you can’t see two feet in front of you—the sound of comfort and exhortation, promise, a future and hope—went out, went silent, dark, blank. A long, uninterrupted nothing.

For 400 years, God was silent. He sent no prophets, crazy as they appeared, who did weird things like walk around naked (Isaiah 20), eat bread baked with cow dung (Ezekiel 4), take back his promiscuous wife multiple times (Hosea), survive the belly of a whale for three days (Jonah), or build a great, big boat for two of every living creature (Noah).

For 400 years, the lights went out on the world. There was no new news from God, no word of encouragement, no reminder of His promise that He would someday send a Messiah to save the world from utter darkness. Nada. Those who waited lived on the fumes of faith. They clung to old prophecies, such as the last words issued in the last chapter of the last book of the Old Testament, Malachi, where God says this:

"Surely the day is coming; it will burn like a furnace. All the arrogant and every evildoer will be stubble, and that day that is coming will set them on fire," says the LORD Almighty. "Not a root or a branch will be left to them. But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall.” [Malachi 4:1-2]

And then the light broke. After 400 years of darkness, Jesus came—The Light of the World, the Messiah, Emmanuel – God with us, came with, as promised, healing in his wings! As Matthew, who wrote the first book in our New Testament say, Jesus came to fulfill the prophecy by Isaiah: the people living in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned. (Isaiah 9:1-2)

Jesus came to be the way for all people through the ages, across all cultures, men and women, slave and free, to have a permanent connection with God He would maintain

Jesus came to shine a light on our lives that would, yes, point out the unsightly, blemished, broken down, damaged, scarred, mean and far from perfect parts of us that we would rather hide. And he came not to condemn but to free us from them.

Jesus came to restore us and restore our relationship with God.
That is what we celebrate at Christmas.

So I have to ask: Have you discovered that part of Christmas yet?

If you feel like the lights have been turned off in your life, or maybe like you could never find the switch. If you feel like you have a little light but it’s just never enough and you long for more so that you can see clearly for once. If you have been living in darkness and in the shadow of death. If the world seems silent and without meaning. If you have no hope to grasp onto and see no future. If you question what love is. If you have been groping for a flashlight and now want to yell for help…

May I introduce you to Jesus?

It’s not hard. It’s simpler than any of us can imagine. Just say:
Jesus, I want you to come into my life. I want your light to shine in my darkness. Come into the empty and deserted places of my heart that no one has been able to occupy. Let me know that I am never alone because you are here. Forgive me for the things I have done and the things I have failed to do. Show me God’s love and open the heavens for the miraculous to occur in my life. Let me experience the power of the Holy Spirit to do the things that I cannot do. I want to live in the light, Jesus. Show me how. Show me now.

May your lights be turned on perpetually from this moment on.

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

Worship Music: Who Am I | by Casting Crowns

2008-12-08T22:09:00.001-10:00

(5210 KB)
Listen on posterous

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning star
Would choose to light the way, for my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am, but because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done, but because of who You are

CHORUS
I am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean, vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling
And You’ve told me who I am, I am yours...

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love, and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain, and calm the storm in me
Not because of who I am, but because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done, but because of who You are

CHORUS

Not because of who I am, but because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done, but because of who You are

CHORUS

I am Yours...
Whom shall I fear, whom shall I fear
Cause I am Yours, I am Yours

Posted via email from 40 Day Fast

N.T. Wright on Worship

2008-12-05T23:58:00.001-10:00

This brings us to the first of two golden rules at the heart of spirituality. You become like what you worship. When you gaze in awe, admiration, and wonder at something or someone, you begin to take on something of the character of the object or your worship. Those who worship money become, eventually, human calculating machines. Those who worship sex become obsessed with their own attractiveness or prowess. Those who worship power become more and more ruthless.

So what happens when you worship the creator God whose plan to rescue the world and put it to rights has been accomplished by the Lamb who was slain? The answer comes in the second golden rule: because you were made in God’s image, worship makes you more truly human. When you gaze in love and gratitude at the God in whose image you were made, you do indeed grow. You discover more of what it means to be fully alive.

Conversely, when you give that same total worship to anything or anyone else, you shrink as a human being. It doesn’t, of course, feel like that at the time. When you worship part of the creation as though it were the Creator himself—in other words, when you worship an idol—you may well feel a brief “high.” But, like a hallucinatory drug, that worship achieves its effect at a cost: when the effect is over, you are less of a human being than you were to begin with. This is the price of idolatry.

The opportunity, the invitation, the summons is there before us: to come and worship the tru God, the creator, the redeemer, and to become more truly human by doing so. Worship is at the very center of all Christian living.

N.T. Wright, Simply Christian, pp 148

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The Bottomless Pit

2008-12-05T01:01:00.001-10:00

It started with a small pimple that then became a blackhead on my sister’s back. Every couple weeks or so, she would have me check to see if it had disappeared, and if not I’d squeeze the blackhead to try to get out all of the collected subcutaneous material (sebum and dead skin). This went on for weeks and months, as it was always still there, always more to squeeze out, never ending. We began calling it “The Bottomless Pit.”

This went on until I moved away, until she got married, at which point The Bottomless Pit became her husband’s responsibility. Whenever I returned home to visit, I’d ask about The Bottomless Pit – and over time it did disappear…but not disappear as in we found no trace of it, but disappear as in The Bottomless Pit gave in to a new identity, evolving from a small pinprick of a blackhead to a larger nodule, and eventually a cyst.

The cyst grew to walnut-size and became fibroidal and hard. No longer could anyone extract anything from it. Lodged between her shoulder blades, it couldn’t be ignored, and she sought a dermatologist who referred her to a surgeon to have it surgically excised.

The Bottomless Pit had taken on a life of its own, morphing from something small and, we thought, manageable to a problem requiring a specialist. The surgeon’s concern now was not just the cyst but that the fibroids had sprouted root-like threads attaching themselves to surrounding muscles…and growing in the direction of the spine. The longer he waited to remove the cyst, the greater the probability that he might cut too close to the spinal cord and cause even greater irreparable damage.

Such is the nature of sin. It starts as a simple pimple (acne [http://ad.vu/p3sk]), a pore or hair follicle irritated by bacteria. Unattended, the pore settles into a blackhead made of sebaceous material and dead skin that we then pick and prod with unclean hands. When it becomes noticeable, we try to squeeze it out, time and time again, but it is a bottomless pit. No matter how many times we go back and try to extract all the dirt that has become an oily, infected mess, there’s still more.

It’s easy enough to know where I’m going. Yeah, yeah, “and that blackhead will become a cyst that grows to infect the larger body which can only be surgically removed by the Great Physician, God.” 10 points for you.

But my main point is not about the cure, it’s about the pit, The Bottomless Pit—acknowledging, understanding, grasping in the depths of our being the helplessness of sin: That it’s bottomless, And that it is a pit in the worse sense of the word, pit being the biblical metaphor for hell, punishment, death. The psalmist cries out in Psalm 88:1-4

1 O LORD, the God who saves me,
       day and night I cry out before you.
2 May my prayer come before you;
       turn your ear to my cry.
3 For my soul is full of trouble
       and my life draws near the grave.
4 I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
       I am like a man without strength.

This understanding about sin and distance from God is not Christianity 101, not mere definition of terms. This understanding is not academic head knowledge to check off our list and move on. Coming to grips with what sin is in or lives is a lifetime experience that shadows every person, a condition that we cannot shake. It does not go away because we are human.

How do I know that sin is a lifetime condition and affliction? I know because Paul the apostle writes about it. Paul, whose thoughts became the foundation for Christian theology because they reflected the experience of all believers, wrote about it in Romans 7:

14 We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. 15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

Paul’s voice echoes our own that no matter how hard we try, sin lives in us. We are infected with the bacteria of sin and we cannot wash it off. Our nature is that we are not God, and as I reflected in an earlier journal entry (The S-Word http://40dayfast.posterous.com/day-31-the-s-word <http://40dayfast.posterous.com/day-31-the-s-word> ), sin is anything and everything that is not God.

Paul concludes his thoughts in Romans 7:24-25 with “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!”

What a wretched man, woman, being am I! The longer we live with Jesus, the more we realize this. The more we see how good and holy, righteous, loving, and just God is, the more we see that we are not.

We cannot fool ourselves at any time that we have “arrived,” that we have come to a special place of spiritual maturity that lifts us out of our human condition and sets us apart from others. That is the most dangerous place of all. When we believe that—and all of us at recurring moments do fall prey to that illusion and lie—we have deconstructed the bottomless pit, degraded it into a self-contained cyst that grows on its own, resistant to change, redemption, and new life.

The best place—the bottomless pit
Anyone who has gone through Alcoholics Anonymous or a similar recovery program will tell you that you have to hit bottom, and until you do no one can help you. What happens when we hit bottom is that we feel powerless to change and finally admit that we need a higher power.

That is what scripture tells us in Psalm 40:
1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
       he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
       out of the mud and mire;
       he set my feet on a rock
       and gave me a firm place to stand.

And in Psalm 103:
1 Praise the LORD, O my soul;
       all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, O my soul,
       and forget not all his benefits-
3 who forgives all your sins
       and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit
       and crowns you with love and compassion,

And what Jonah cried out from the belly of the whale:
To the roots of the mountains I sank down;
     the earth beneath barred me in forever.
     But you brought my life up from the pit,
     O LORD my God. [Jonah 2:6]

The mystery of a life in Jesus Christ is that we can hold in tension the dual realities of the pit and the heights, sin and sanctification, heaven and hell. That mystery is encapsulated in one word: faith.

Faith is what Hebrews 11:1 says— “being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” More than the “suspension of disbelief,” a term coined by the 19th Century English poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge to explain why we can temporarily accept implausible works of fiction and art, faith dismantles disbelief.

Faith does not ignore the pit, it suspends us over the pit. It holds us safe even though we are close the fire, in the lions’ den, standing among accusers, and when we lose traction in life. Faith is remembering how good God is, not just relying on our honest attempts to be good.

And, yes, faith is knowing that God through the unparalleled act of Jesus Christ excises our sin, removes it completely when he covers over our sin with his own body. Jesus is the cover over the bottomless pit. We just have to acknowledge that it’s there.

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N.T. Wright on Worship

2008-12-04T21:12:00.001-10:00

When we begin to glimpse the reality of God, the natural reaction is to worship him. Not to have that reaction is a fairly sure sign that we haven’t yet really understood who he is or what he’s done.

N.T. Wright, Simply Christian, p 143

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One to the Power of One

2008-12-04T00:13:00.001-10:00

Mathematics is a magically complex, intriguing mechanism. The number of fascinating math tricks is endless, and through its relationship with science, numbers can now explain almost anything: how fast, how high, how far, how long in both microscopic and galactic scales.

Numbers now help us fathom the universe, such as how far to Jupiter or a distant nebulae or how large a particular plant cell. I can visit my doctor and she’ll read me the numbers that describe my health: cholesterol levels (both HDL and LDL), liver function, bone density, glucose, heart rate, vision, and of course weight.

I read the news and watch the stock market go up and down, weather forecast up and down, gas prices up and down, presidential approval ratings up and down, surf at Waikiki and Waimea Bay up and down.

My computer screen top menu tells me how much battery charge I have left, cell phone how many minutes I’ve talked, calendar how many days until, cash register how much I owe, YouTube screen how many seconds until the end, Facebook how many friends, USDA nutritional box how many calories.

Numbers, numbers, numbers. Mathematicians and scientists love them as a language all its own. Musicians rely upon them for rhythm. Chefs employ them for proportions, heating requirements, cooking times. And what parent has not counted to 10 as a warning of things to come?

But the most important number? I thinks it’s one. One. 1. Uno, Une. Ichi, 一 .

One is the basic unit upon which all other calculations are based. One is the plumb line that every other number, gargantuan or fractional, multiple or decimal, is measured against, compared with, understood.

And One is the number that God cares about most.

Of course, the Bible is replete with numbers. From the beginning, in the beginning, the writer of Genesis describes the number of days God took to create the world…starting with Day 1. And when He created man, God started with one. Then He added to the one, saying, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." [Gen 2:18]

We read in the Bible about Noah and God’s command for him to bring two of every kind of animal on the ark, with specific dimensions: “450 feet long, 75 feet wide and 45 feet high.” We know how long it rained during The Flood—40 days and 40 nights—and we know how old Noah was when the rain began falling: 600 years old, and that it commenced on the seventeenth day of the second month of the year.

The Book of Numbers has its share of digits, and scripture gives the exact dimensions for the Temple that King Solomon built. And let’s not forget that in order to locate all these scripture passages, we rely upon numbers, chapter and verse, meticulously added in the second millennium A.D.

And yet, the most important number among all of these remains one. God cares about the one, the individual among the masses. He selects the one to accomplish specific tasks, singling out Noah, Abraham, Joseph, Ruth, David, Daniel, Mary, John the Baptist, Paul. Jesus tells of God the shepherd leaving the 99 to find the one lost sheep and says, “there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents."

Who is the “one” that Jesus talks of? To which one did Jesus come to show the love of God? Who is the one that Jesus died for? And to which one has He given the Holy Spirit?

I am that one. You are that one. Every individual person, every one is that one.

Moreover, Jesus did not come just for the one, but he came to make us one—that is, to make us whole, a complete integer. He came to restore us so that we would not be a fraction of the person that God created us to be. God subtracts nothing from us but adds until we are absolutely full. Jesus came to take the crumbling parts of who we are, patch us back together, and regenerate us in God’s Holy Spirit into something, Someone, more whole, complete, integrated, fully functioning, more wonderful than we could ever be by ourselves.

The Power of One is one raised to the One power – God’s power that makes us more fully one than we could humanly be without Him. We are stronger for The One. We are more humble for the one. Raised by God to stand tall in the shadow of The One, each one of us has purpose, meaning, value that can never be torn from us. Nor can we be replicated. God’s made only one of us, and that pleases Him to see us come as we are—come one by one to Him.

In a world fraught with numbers, counting, calculating, comparing, it would do us good to stop daily, every day, to consider The One who loves us and knows who we are apart from others. We need to know that God sees us, one among the many. And that’s the only thing that counts.

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Day 40: Finish line

2008-11-30T20:13:00.001-10:00

Well, it’s over. Our church’s 40-day fast has officially ended and life can return to normal. But hopefully not.

I’ve used the metaphor of a race to describe the process of our fast, but in this instance the finish line isn’t so much a finish line as in “it’s all over” as a finish line as in “we’ve reached a new level of polish.”

Living with God is about polishing – not so our outsides will look all clean and shiny, slick, gleaming, spotless, and glowing, but so that our insides are always growing to a higher level of completeness. The Lord wants to constantly refinish our interior life, sanding down the rough spots, patching up the crumbling parts, replacing the broken mechanisms, oiling the squeaks, caulking the holes, clearing away the debris, and wiping us clean with His embrace.

Coming to the finish line, therefore, is as much about beginnings as endings. I’ve gone through the process and emerged a renewed and renovated me. Where do I go from here? How, then, do I live?

In the first few days after ending a fast, it’s hard to go back. My husband Dan who has a sweet tooth fasted from desserts for the 40 days, and when he had the opportunity to break the fast even he said that it felt strange. I think that’s a good thing.

There is something about remembering the times of testing that builds resiliency in us. A self-imposed fast is, of course, artificial in its hardship, and yet it still calls us to look for and rely upon the faithfulness of God.

That faithfulness can only be known by experience, and we relive and rely upon it through story telling, remembering the when of how God did the what without explaining the why.

Our friend Christy recently had an image or vision for Dan and I while she was praying for us. She said it was of Dan “going into a jungle with a big knife (or sickle?) chopping your way through the bush and jungle. Pam has binoculars and is walking behind you looking the other way behind you.”

I interpret that as God’s message to us that going forward in the path that God has for us in its immediacy will be tough and require a lot of pushing forward with strength and perseverance, but if we need look back, using binoculars to look way back into the past through where He has taken us, we will see His great faithfulness and how far we have come with Him.

Remember God’s faithfulness.
That’s a lesson for Dan and I, but it’s also a lesson for every person. When we stand with God in the present, we can look back into our past and see what God has done to get us to here, to this particular finish line. We need to be reminded, we need to tell each other the stories of God in our lives and of His unfailing love.

That’s the lesson of Hebrews 11, one of my favorite passages in the New Testament. It starts out with, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” It then goes through a catalogue of faithful believing by the patriarchs, the men and women of the Old Testament who looked for and trusted in God’s promises, then pushed ahead without knowing exactly what the future looked like. Just like trying to hack one’s way through a dense jungle.

Hebrews speaks about the patriarchs looking forward—and then it tells us to look back, look back at them and their stories, their examples, to see God’s faithfulness over the millennia.

Where do we go from here?
We go forward. We keep taking that next step even in the entanglements, and maybe especially because of the entanglements, towards God’s freedom. And we go forward even better equipped and stronger and filled with more faith because of what lies behind us.

I am reminded of what Paul writes in his Letter to the Philippians. He writes to encourage them after they had heard of his imprisonment for openly sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ—something he cannot help but do. He writes in Philippians 3:12-14:

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Many of us know this passage well. But hear it again as told by Eugene Peterson in his modern translation, The Message

I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.

Not turning back. That is the attitude I want to continuously hold. I can’t quite see what lies ahead, but I’m not turning back. I’m finished with this stage of the race, but I’m not finished yet, and I’m not turning back. I’m well on my way, though sometimes the going is slow, but God’s winds are blowing me in His direction. The race is good. The goal is worthwhile. God is beckoning me onward. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.

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Day 39: Rule #5

2008-11-28T23:43:00.002-10:00

When my kids were young, I used to give them rules before leaving them home with babysitters. Simple rules. No more than five. Always written out and read to them (since at 3 and 5 them couldn’t). Rules like these:

You may watch one video
Put away your toys
Brush your teeth
Go to bed at 8 pm
Have FUN.

Always Rule #5. After the stern admonitions, the don’t forgets, the responsible stuff, there was always Rule #5. It was a wink, a Mommy loves you, and early instruction on understanding that good rules are for our good and aren’t always hard to keep.

That was the mom in me at work. Or more accurately God at work in the mom at me at work – aware that most of the time as a parent I was making it up as I went along.

Years later, though, Rule #5 still applies—to my grown children’s lives in school, with their friends, in their work. I’m also learning that God applies it to me—my work, my ministry, my life.

Have fun. Sounds shallow, superfluous, self-centered—downright sinful when there are so many things to be done, people to be helped, causes to advance, trees to be saved, lives to be rescued from poverty, prostitution, pornography, pollution. And yet, the question, “Are we having fun yet?” has become one of my criteria for measuring the value of my labor.

One of my criteria, not the criteria, “fun” is an everyday colloquialism for the theological principle of Joy. Joy characterizes the inner life of disciples of Jesus Christ. It is one of the fruit or by-products of walking with, working with, reveling in God’s Holy Spirit. Joy ranks in Paul’s list in Galatians 5:22-23 when he writes, “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”

There is no law (rule) against joy (fun), so why not make a law (rule) for it? Why not look for it, anticipate it, wait for it? And why not measure our lives with it—not for fun and games but for evidence of the life of Jesus operating in us.

Joy is the feeling I have when God gets me through prolonged, trying situations – often by changing me.

Joy is the reward in working with others, pooling our gifts and talents, in a God-designed project that none of us could do alone.

Joy is in the laughter resounding among my friends even amid the tears of our shared lives.

Joy is the kernel in humility that makes me able to laugh at my faults and foibles.

Joy is God’s shot of energy that fuels my creative process and prods me forward, forward, forward—a tantalizing motivator and not a cruel taskmaster.

Joy is God’s pat on the back in doing something worthwhile for others.

Joy is the gold and diamonds deposited in my heart-vault in the love I receive from others.

Joy is a memory and a promise, the reminder that the Holy Spirit is at work in me even when I can’t see or feel it.

Life is hard. There’s no getting around it. We do hurt, we do make mistakes. We have faults and we fail others. We will be betrayed and misunderstood, maligned, mocked, misrepresented, and maltreated—even as followers of Jesus Christ, maybe especially as followers of Jesus Christ. Living longer under Jesus’s lordship, gaining more experience and growing wiser doesn’t necessarily make life any easier. But where ease comes up short, joy fills in.

That joy, as all the fruit of the Spirit, comes out of relationships, first with God and then with others as the Spirit works in us. We cannot enjoy the fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control—outside of relationships. These are only experienced within relationships. And when we do experience them, even in the hard stuff, you bet, we’ve got Rule #5.

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Day 38: Iron Monkey

2008-11-26T11:50:00.001-10:00

If my spiritual wu shu could only look like this!

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Days 26 + 37: Rolling with the Punches

2008-11-25T22:25:00.001-10:00

I love a good kung fu movie. Step aside, Quentin Tarentino and Kill Bill, Steven Seagal, and Jean-Claude Van Damme, I’m popping my corn for the Chinese genre: Jet Li, Ti Lung, Donnie Yen, Michelle Yeoh, Jackie Chan, Yuen Woo Ping choreography, flicks like Wing Chun, Once Upon in China, Iron Monkey, Hero, Kung Fu Hustle, and, yes, even Kung Fu Panda.

In my book, a good kung fu movie has to have amazing martial arts choreography, never seen before stunts, household items used as weapons, strong women holding their own, and humor, lots of it.

The best kung fu has a great deal of dodging and fancy footwork, flipping, leaping. Hands quickly deflect a battery of blows, a single pole skillfully handled will hold off teams of attackers. Way before Obi Wan Kenobi whispered, “Use the force, Luke” kung fu films accessed the life force of qi to scale walls, leap over buildings, and levitate.

Gotta love those kung fu movies. A good model for what we can do when we are spiritually fit—deflect, defeat, defend.

Say what?

Like kung fu practioners, when followers of Jesus engage in regular, disciplined spiritual exercises, we acquire “secret moves” for managing the stories of our lives. Kung fu students learn sets and forms, stances as well as rigid routines that begin with boring repetition (remember Karate Kid and “wax on, wax off?”) but over time merge into graceful, flowing dances. Kung fu starts as basic fighting skills but at its highest form becomes wu shu 武术 — martial arts.
In Matthew 5, Jesus says:
You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. [vv 38-42]

Sounds like wu shu to me. However, what Jesus teaches are not athletic practices for defeating our enemies but relationship moves that help us roll with the punches. We might be able to dodge a bullet once or maybe twice. But life has so many zinging arrows, landmines, and ticking bombs that we have to be trained in how to respond in ways that defuse situations instead of escalating them. Moves like these don’t come easy or naturally, and mastery doesn’t come through practice hitting sessions at home.

To get to the place where we can offer our cheek, give someone the clothes off our back, go the second mile, we have to learn how to walk differently, train ourselves in new reactions, and develop new muscle memory.

We have to plug ourselves into God's operating system, the one guided by His force, the Holy Spirit. That only comes by taking part in a spiritual exercise programs involving disciplines such as prayer, worship, Sabbath, study, confession, accountability, service, giving.

Little by little, over time, slowly with practice, God transforms our feeble efforts, small prayers, obedient giving until we have a new outlook on life. Equipped with gifts and skills from God that we know how to use, we can walk through chaos, mend failed relationships, restore lost paths, resurrect dead hope, and cure diseased mindsets. We can feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, and bring home the lost. We can rebuild our families. We will find we can do what Paul instructs us in Romans 12:14-18 and:

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

The Christian life is not one without pain, hardship, trial, suffering, betrayal, or injustice. In fact, the longer I live and the more I grow as a believer, the more hurt, sorrow, disappointment, loss, and failure I encounter. It never goes away.

However, as I train with God, He develop within me the spiritual fitness to get up when knocked down, to duck the swings, tumble to safety, protect my heart, laugh at my follies, and roll with the punches. And that’s far better than even the best kung fu movie.
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Day 35: The Final Stretch

2008-11-23T00:12:00.001-10:00

Day 35: The Final Stretch

Five days to go in the 40-Day Fast. I can be tempted to view the remaining days as the final moments before relief, a “just hold on a little longer, you can do it” frame of mind—survival mentality as it were. That would be an expected and respectable response to 40 days of any kind of increased rigor whether spiritual, physical, mental, or dietary. Discipline can be tiring, boring, unrewarding and even masochistic.

But I am discovering something different that catches me by surprise. Rather than this being the beginning of the end, I think this could be the best stage of all. A final stretch that has me not just reaching for the finish line but accelerating past it.

5 weeks with 5 days to go
I’m no athlete but I am a dedicated lap swimmer, slow but steady in my workouts. The first 100 is easy: I’m fresh, energized, my muscles aren’t tired. The next several hundred, however, I feel myself tiring. I have to breathe a little more often and concentrate on pulling my hands through the water, keeping up my kick. However, by the time I reach my 800- , 900-meter mark, I’ve found my groove. My heart beats hard but strong, my kick has found the rhythm to match my stroke, each slice of my arm through the water brings a feeling of more power as I finally settle into ideal aerodynamics. Sometimes the feeling is so good in the final stretch, I don’t want to stop and switch into the next part of my workout.

It’s near to feeling that way now, not that the past 5 weeks have made me a superior follower of Christ, increased my virtues or performance, or made me any more holier. Rather, it’s the feeling of finding a new groove, of finally putting the mechanics into place so that what used to feel hard has lost some of the fatigue of the trying, replaced instead with a new conscious level of understanding of who God is and how his kingdom works.

When I swim, throughout my routine I’m in the same water, operating under the same conditions, using the same equipment. I don’t pop a few steroids or stop for an energy boost in the middle. Nothing changes from the beginning of my swim to the end. The longer I swim, the more nothing changes. But as I swim and push against the resistance, I slowly find my stride, and that takes me to a new level.

Dark horses
This summer I went to the racetracks for the first time. Our friends have a box at Arlington Park in the Chicago suburbs where you can watch the horses race live on Arlington track as well as watch live feeds from other premier racetracks like Churchill Downs, Pimlico and Belmont. The box is under the eaves and right in front of the finish line. From there you can see the horses rounding the final corner, pounding down the home stretch, jockeys astraddle, tails flying, heads, necks, hooves galloping to the finish.

My favorite races are the ones where a horse comes from behind, creeping forward through the pack, and with a final unexpected burst of acceleration eclipses the leader to win the heat.

What impresses me is not so much that the horse beats out the winner as the energy, strength, and muscle these colts and fillies gather in the final stretch to sail home. Somewhere in that final stretch, the jockey working with the horse knows when that horse can accelerate to a level of performance that has the horse using more of its potential.

That comes with practice. It comes form a jockey knowing his horse. It’s a combination of diet and exercise, healthful habits, rest, and, yes, ability, too.

Homestretch
In my homestretch I feel like I’m finally getting it. God as my jockey is using the feeble practices of this fast to take me to a new level, to give me a new awareness of His life in me.

What does that look like? For me, it’s discovering His hand in my everyday life, not just looking for intervention through the miraculous. Instead of backing away with excuses, it’s accepting and engaging in the exercise – the hard work – of wrestling with thoughts, ideas, perceptions, and questions, and not just settling for what I thought I believed or what others have told me to believe.

It’s a growing openness to the likely possibility—okay, to the growing certainty that my idea of happiness falls short of God’s. It is acknowledging my sin (see Day 31) and all the ways that I am not God. It is a re-gathering of all that I am in the direction of God.

I’m reminded of what Paul writes in Romans 12:1-2 about being transformed and renewed, quoted here in Eugene Peterson’s translation, The Message:

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

I’m looking at the final stretch to be a good stretch in every meaning of the word: a time to not wind down and relax, but to let God use the new elasticity He’s creating in me to not huff and puff to the end but to send me soaring past the finish line.

Posted by email from 40 Day Fast (posterous)

Day 34 Rest

2008-11-23T00:08:00.001-10:00

   By the seventh day
      God had finished his work.
   On the seventh day
      he rested from all his work.
   God blessed the seventh day.
      He made it a Holy Day
   Because on that day he rested from his work,
      all the creating God had done.
                                Genesis 2:2-4 | Translated in The Message

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Day 33: On being a shallow person~Oswald Chambers

2008-11-21T23:30:00.001-10:00

Leave it to Oswald Chambers to cut through the spiritual posturing and say it’s okay to be shallow.

Shallow and Profound
Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God —1 Corinthians 10:31

Beware of allowing yourself to think that the shallow aspects of life are not ordained by God; they are ordained by Him equally as much as the profound. We sometimes refuse to be shallow, not out of our deep devotion to God but because we wish to impress other people with the fact that we are not shallow. This is a sure sign of spiritual pride. We must be careful, for this is how contempt for others is produced in our lives. And it causes us to be a walking rebuke to other people because they are more shallow than we are. Beware of posing as a profound person— God became a baby.

To be shallow is not a sign of being sinful, nor is shallowness an indication that there is no depth to your life at all— the ocean has a shore. Even the shallow things of life, such as eating and drinking, walking and talking, are ordained by God. These are all things our Lord did. He did them as the Son of God, and He said, "A disciple is not above his teacher . . ." ( Matthew 10:24 ).

We are safeguarded by the shallow things of life. We have to live the surface, commonsense life in a commonsense way. Then when God gives us the deeper things, they are obviously separated from the shallow concerns. Never show the depth of your life to anyone but God. We are so nauseatingly serious, so desperately interested in our own character and reputation, we refuse to behave like Christians in the shallow concerns of life.

Make a determination to take no one seriously except God. You may find that the first person you must be the most critical with, as being the greatest fraud you have ever known, is yourself.

November 22 reading | My Utmost for His Highest | Oswald Chambers Daily Devotional

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Day 32: The Other S Word

2008-11-21T22:48:00.001-10:00

Sigh.

That last posting on sin really took a lot out of me. I struggled over every thought.

Sometimes when I write, it comes spilling out like ink from a jar. I know where God is moving me. Other times, I wrestle, thoughts pulling me one way and another, words painfully executed, then excised, edited, erased, then reiterated—and not able to rest until I have pushed through all the way to discover where God wanted me to go.

The gift of this blog during this 40 Day Fast is that, number one, it’s forced me to write. But more than putting words to paper, it has, number two, forced me to think, to exercise the muscle in my brain that can clearly and joyfully articulate God in my life. Sometimes I get it well enough early enough to just write it down. Other times, I am learning as I write.

Number three, the exercise – the discipline – has helped me to grow. There is nothing like disciplined exercise for helping us grow in any area, whether it be an athletic activity, a musical instrument, reading, or thinking. Thank you, God, for pulling me up the ladder a little higher.

The older I get, the more I understand the need for discipline. And that’s why it’s helpful to regularly engage in spiritual disciplines like fasting, journaling, giving, worshipping. The gain is so much more than the perceived sacrifice. Fasting, as I said on Day 28, is feasting.

As to the Other S Word. Not sigh, but Sabbath. Rest. Feeling God as we rest in Him. Not working for Him, not sacrificing for Him, but taking long deep breaths of God. So, maybe sigh after all. And that’s what I need, we need.

This is all to say that if I take a break in the next day or so, it could be me getting a good Sabbath, getting in a good sigh with God.

Posted by email from 40 Day Fast (posterous)

Day 32: The Other S Word

2008-11-20T23:47:00.001-10:00

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Day 31: The S-word

2008-11-20T22:06:00.001-10:00

My friend Mitch got me thinking about sin this week. We were at an open forum where I was interviewing him about being a follower of Jesus Christ as a business leader. I had the easy job.

The thing is, he mentioned the “S” word—SIN, in a public setting. At least it was in a Christian setting where everyone in the room was on the same page. But it also felt so very public, meeting in a private room of a popular entertainment center, awash in loud, driving music, rapid fire video games, mounds of food, beer, beer and more beer, and ka-chink! It could have been a casino, except gambling isn’t legal here.

The “S” word can be jarring. No one uses it in public except “religious” people and those in the other S-word industry, the Sex Industry, where sin is star. Sin is either really, really bad, or oh so good!

Is there a happy medium? Oh that’s right, we’re talking about sin, the idea of wrongdoing. And that’s the problem. How does one talk about it without feeling judged or judgmental, without feeling ashamed or confused? It’s an uncomfortable word because, frankly, it admits wrongdoing and that’s just not a good feeling. We live in an enlightened society, we hold tolerant values, we are a compassionate people, and whether we believe in Jesus or not we like Jesus’ words to do unto others as we would have others do unto us. Don’t tell us we’ve sinned. We won’t tell if you don’t.

And yet, if we do follow Jesus’ words—all of them and not just the convenient ones—if we believe in a God who is not just good but perfect, just and righteous, if we want to have a relationship with Him, we have to come to grips with the fact that we are not like Him.

We have to spend serious time considering not just what makes us different but what separates us from Him. That is what I think sin is. Sin is the difference between God and us. It is everything that He is not.

The Greek word for sin used most frequently in the Bible is hamartia which literally means “missing a target or mark” —as when the Apostle Paul wrote, “For all have sinned [hamartano], and come short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). We can then say that everything that is outside of the bulls-eye is outside of the glory of God. Anything that falls short of receiving the adulation that God deserves, anything that is one iota less magnificent than God—is not God and is therefore sin.

Therefore, to know what sin is, we have to know God. When we know God, we will recognize what is not Him. We will understand what falls short, where we miss the mark, how we sin.

The S-word is still not something I want to flash around in public. But I can understand it more if I see it through the light of God rather than dig for it in the darkness of my heart. If thinking about sin actually gives me more freedom to think about God’s goodness, greatness, awesomeness, incomparableness, His grace towards me, His tenderness, His love for me—I feel empowered, I feel liberated. I actually feel okay about making a long list of how I am not like God.

And that is a good thing. When I can see how desirable God is but at the same time see the distance that lies between Him and I, how much more do I understand my need for Jesus. Only Jesus who is fully God and fully man can cover that chasm. That was and is God's plan for all the S words: sin, sacrifice, sanctification, salvation.

Paul writes in Romans 8:31-39 —
If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
"For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Posted by email from 40 Day Fast (posterous)

Day 31: In Memoriam - Luke Nishikawa

2008-11-19T20:39:00.001-10:00

Here with us 1986 – 2008 | Home with God November 15, 2008

“Friends” by Michael W. Smith, sung here by Na Leo Pilimehana

Article and video on Luke’s untimely departure at: http://kgmb9.com/main/content/view/11552/40/

(6720 KB)
Listen on posterous

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Day 30: Asking for it

2008-11-18T00:45:00.001-10:00

When we pray, we’re asking for it. Literally.

Prayer is many things and has lots of different forms and functions, but the one function that is most familiar is prayer that asks for something. The technical term would be “supplication” or asking God to supply.

Now after a while, some of us begin to realize that much of our relationship with God is asking for it. It’s a pretty one-sided conversation. When was the last time in prayer that we turned to God and said, “And what about you? What can I do you for?”

We don’t because we know even before we start asking that we can’t do much for God, not really. After all He IS the Creator of the Universe, the Maker of Heaven and Earth, All-Holy, Almighty, Omnipotent God. Pretty hard to have a reciprocal relationship with someone like that.

But does God mind? Does he mind all the asking?

I remember when my daughter at not quite 3 years old was getting into her stride talking and launching into “conversation.” We were trapped on one of those long car rides between LA and San Francisco, and were pressing on non-stop through the more boring stretches that have you begging to just get home.

But my daughter didn’t notice it was boring. She was conversing, using her words, learning the fine art of social relationship with her mom, the “connection thing”—and asking one why question after another. She had a lot to ask: Why this? Why that? And what about that?…with no stopping to pause, ponder, pout or play. After about two hours, I had to say, “Honey, can you just be quiet now and not talk to Mommy for a while?”

She had exhausted me. It’s not that I didn’t like talking with my daughter. I just didn’t have the answers.

That’s the difference between God and I: He does have all the answers. And because He does, God delights in our asking. Our asking opens the doors to Who He Really Is.

In Matthew 7:7-11, Jesus tells us:
Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

The invitation to ask doesn’t go only for the pretty, neatly wrapped things that can be easily packaged and tidily put away. That’s how we humans would have all our answers.

The invitation takes on new dimensions when we give God something hard. I wonder if God loves these prayers best because it gives us the opportunity to see what God can do.

Let me repeat that: It gives US the opportunity to see what God can do. Asking God the impossible removes the limits we place on the possible. Asking admits that God has powers beyond human capability, thought or genius. When we ask the impossible, we turn the corner on who God is—from a neatly boxed God to not what I thought he was, and then even more. That, in itself is a miracle within us that changes everything.

Every prayer is a crack in the wall between heaven and earth, a wall not put up by God, but our wall of little imagination that prefers to gaze at the limited things of earth than wonder at the limitless things of heaven. Ask for it.

Posted by email from 40 Day Fast (posterous)

Pam's Thots

Lentil Soup

Tiny Thots: Pride is an action, humilty a result. | 07.13.11

Tiny Thots: If I should write a book, remind me to not make it a "How To" but a "How I" | 07.11.11

Tiny Thots: If I should write a book, remind me to not make it a "How To" but a "How I" | 07.11.11

Creamed Corn

Lebanese Vegetable Soup

Café Beaujolais Cherry Clafouti

Daniel Fast Pick-Me-Up

Untitled

Tiny Thots: My Day in Words & Pictures | 01.16.11

Tiny Thots: A good thought for today: Imagine Me | Kirk Franklin | 01.08.11

Tiny Thots: A good thought for today: Imagine Me | Kirk Franklin | 01.08.11

Tiny Thots: Here's why mothers should save their emails | 01.02.11

Crispy skinned roast chicken å la Martha Stewart

Tiny Thot: Love never gives up | 12.03.10 #TeensyThot

In the chess game of life, there's often an unseen hand [#teensythot]

Tiny Thots: Letting Go | 11.23.10

Tiny Thots: Keeping friends by knowing when not to speak (Proverbs) | 11.20.10

Control is the ultimate illusion [#teensythot]

Tiny Thots: Specks, sawdust, planks, shortcuts and passwords (a not too tiny thot) | 11.18.10

Tiny Thots: Spoken and heard | 11.15.10

Psalm 62

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

Tiny Thots: Family | 11.13.10

Tiny Thots: Beautiful Exchange | 11.12.10

Tiny Thots: An undivided heart | 11.10.10

Tiny Thots: Yoke's on me | 11.08.10

Tiny Thots: Surrender | 11.06.10

Tiny Thots: Nothing in This World | 10.31.10

Tiny Thots: Lamenting | 10.30.10

Tiny Thots: Really | 10.21.10

Tiny Thots: Speaking up } 16 Oct 2010

"Chasing Rainbows" | Hawaii Film Festival selection

Tiny Thots: Love and Forgiveness | 17 Sept 2010

Tiny Thots: Elephant Skin | 09.09.10

Tiny Thots: Judgment vs. Discernment | 09.08.10

Reminded by Israel Houghton that "nothing surprises you, Jesus."

Listening to: Whole World in His Hands | Tim Hughes

Agree with your adversary quickly . . .  Matthew 5:25

Notes on temptation

Been jumpin' to all weekend: Israel Houghton | Just Wanna' Say | Music Video

Untitled

I'm standing with my heart abandoned ♪♫♪

Lying with the shepherd

You Are Great (audio) | John Larson

Eye of the Needle | January 3, 2010

Other places God's been at work: Three ways to keep you ego in check (John Baldoni of Harvard Business Review)

God's been working on my insides

The blessing of friends

Regina Brett's 45 life lessons and 5 to grow on

You can't change *anybody*

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Nov 2-3, Days 16 & 17: True faith

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Oct 31-Nov 1, Days 14 & 15: How to be blessed

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 29-30, Days 12 & 13: The Element of Surprise

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 28, Day 11: Who Am I [Casting Crowns]

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 27, Day 10: Earth shaking blessings

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 26, Day 9: Word of God Speak

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 25, Day 9: Counting my blessings

Blessing me as I listen

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 24, Day 8: Listen to the blessing

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 23, Day 7: All you need is a table

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 22, Day 6: Blessed at the foot of the cross

The best king of Israel has fallen the farthest. But neither he, nor anyone, can fall beyond the reach of God's love & forgiveness -P.Yancey

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 21, Day 5: When fair isn't fair

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 20, Day 4: The cloak of blessing

Who is blessed?

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 19, Day 3: How to Bless, Who to Bless

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, October 18, Day 2: Unconditional Love

Fall 2009 40-Day Fast, Day 1: Bless

Humbled and grateful

Notions

Scarred for Life

One sentence on Being a Christian

What delights me

Stewardship Buzz | Lent Blog Post

Why I Need Forgiveness | March 4, 2009 blog post

Waking March 2, 2009

More Thoughts on Powerlessness February 28, 2009

Thoughts on Powerlessness, February 27, 2009

Agree with your adversary quickly . . . Matthew 5:25

You can't change anybody